I got pregnant when i was 19. Didn’t matter to me if my dad didn’t let me hang out with guys – instead of letting him know about my life, everything was done behind his back. I knew he did it all because he loves me, but I didn’t feel loved with this kind of treatment.
My brothers got more freedom because they’re guys, but it made me more bitter and strained my relationship with my brothers then.
And when i got pregnant when i was 19, i went for abortion alone. Sad thing is, I didn’t tell my parents since they’re so controlling and strict. It has been more than 12 years and they still don’t know it, only my spouse and close friends know about it. From time to time i am still sad and wish i could have had their support then. It was painful for me to go through it alone.
My advice to you is to move out once you have started working. Once you have your own financial stability.
Also, to parents thinking monitoring every move of your child “protects” your child, well maybe it does – especially when they are kids, of course they need to be monitored. But once they are older than that… it helps to have some compromise. Guidance and proper advice on how to handle relationships and safe sex with the opposite gender is also important (I didn’t have any such talks with my parents.. they just kept telling me NO sex, no this no that).
As in my case, controlling too much takes away the privilege that you are the safe space for your child.
Netizen’s comments
I’m not sure …what could your dad have done differently then ? Will it really make a difference ( I genuinely wonder )
Sometimes as parents we can do all the ‘ right ‘ things and kids will still choose their own path n ways . Too strict – backfire , too lax – gone astray.
At some point the child need to take up the responsibility of which path he or she chooses . As parents we can only do our best n pray … And love them no matter how they turn out …