S assaulted at 14 – should I report this 16 years later?
I was s assaulted by my ex-colleague when I was 14 years old while working for those part-time job. It has scarred me ever since and I can’t seem to overcome the trauma.
His siblings are still on my social media and sometimes I search to find out how my predator is doing. He is married with a child and looks happy. I cannot forget the day when he tricked me into a secluded corner thinking it was some surprise celebration.
The worse thing is he did not only assault me once but twice. I was too young and scared to tell anyone then. He told me he did it because he love me and that screwed up my mind and perception of love. After that, he said he did it because every guy in his secondary school has already done it.
I remember I did not fight back and froze in terror. The smell, the moment is still vivid and I sometimes freeze if I smell something similar to that moment.
I definitely have mental illness after that as I am often thinking to take my own life. Sometimes I feel like I should have reported him to the authorities. Is it too late? Will anyone believe me? Can I see justice done?
What will happen to his baby?
I feel so much misery. Seeing a private mental health professional costs $200 per hour. I tried going to IMH and got referred to a psychiatrist and psychologist but the psychiatrist/psychologist kept looking at the clock or watch. I hated how they ask me to rate my emotions on a notepad. Stupid SOP.
It definitely didn’t work.
I also got referred to a community Center counsellor and she ask me to look at the flame in the candle to have peace or listen to the sound of water. What kind of bull sheet is that?!
When I started work, there were incidents when male colleagues tried to kiss me or ask me to go and bring them around at night. I dress conservatively and work hard, so is this a common and normal thing?
So many problems and no one to turn to.