I’m a 30 year old female virgin who’s never been in a relationship
Most people my age are already married with kids and I on the other hand haven’t even had my first kiss yet. I never even held hands with a guy.
Yes, I really am THAT inexperienced. It’s so embarassing to admit this. My 16 year old cousin has a girlfriend and seems to be in a happy relationship.
I’m happy for him but I also can’t help but be a little jealous of him. I can’t believe my cousin, who’s more than a decade younger than me, got into a relationship before I did. I feel like such a pathetic loser. What is wrong with me?
I have no one else but myself to blame for this. It’s not like guys never showed interest in me. I was just always too shy and too anxious to talk to guys.
Whenever any guy showed any kind of interest in me I didn’t know what to do or what to say. I would get very embarassed, I would avoid eye contact and most guys took this as a sign that I had no interest in them so they stopped talking to me and moved on to a different girl.
I understand that it’s my fault that I’m still a single, kissless virgin at 30. If I don’t want to be single I obviously have to put myself out there and show interest in guys.
I obviously should also go to therapy to deal with my social anxiety but I feel like doing all of this is just pointless. I mean I already hit the wall.
I’m not nearly as young and pretty as I used to be. What’s the point of improving myself and putting myself out there? It’s not like any decent man would show interest in me anyway.
Most guys aren’t interested in dating a washed up, old inexperienced hag like myself that is way past her prime and who has nothing to offer them.
I wasted my youth doing nothing. I spent my entire 20s rotting away in bed and doing nothing. I have been unemployed for 8 years.
Still live with my parents. Can’t drive. Barely graduated school. Don’t have any kind of career. Haven’t worked in years. My entire family is disappointed of me and it’s all my fault.
I cannot imagine why any decent man would want to date someone like me. I’m a mentally ill loser with a lot of baggage and have literally nothing to offer to a man.
Most men my age also seem to prefer to date women way younger than myself. I’m not ugly but I can’t compete with young girls in their early 20s.
There’s so many beautiful young girls out there that aren’t losers like myself. How can I compete with them? I can’t.
I don’t blame men for being attracted to younger women. It’s biology. I do sometimes get very sad when men online talk about how ugly, unattractive and useless women over 30 are.
I hate constantly being reminded of how ugly I am to most men. I mean, I get it. Young women are obviously more attractive than old hags like myself. That’s just a fact. That’s just how it is but I really wish some men on here could be a little nicer and have more compassion for older women.
Not all of us are narcissistic and only chasing chads. Some of us older ladies haven’t found love yet because we are mentally ill and have a hard time putting ourself out there, not because we are too picky.
Please don’t laugh at me but sometimes I lie awake at night and cry myself to sleep because I’m too old to truly be considered attractive by most men my age and I will never know what’s it like to be truly desired by a man.
I will never know what’s it like to be lusted after, to be truly wanted by a man. I truly want to be desired by a man. I dream of it everyday. I don’t want just to be settled for.
I know there’s plenty of men out there that are desperate and would fuck anything with a hole in it but I actually want to sleep with a guy because he truly desires me and is attracted to me and not just because he can’t find a hotter girl to sleep with
but as an older woman it’s so hard to find men who are truly attracted to you and aren’t just secretly settling for you because they can’t get anyone better. It makes me sad that I will most likely never experience love.
I don’t want to force any man to be attracted to me but I just wish there were more men out there that are attracted to older women and that can look past flaws.
If I would have put myself out there when I was younger I could have found myself a nice, understanding man that would have been attracted to my body
now that I’m older it’s gonna be very hard to find a guy that is interested in me and is willing to overlook all my horrible flaws. I’m sorry for the long rant but I really needed to get this off my chest.
I’m pretty lonely and don’t have any friends that I can talk to about my troubles. If you’re still reading this thank you for listening to my troubles. Typing this out made me feel a little better.