How do you convince yourself to find a relationship in today’s economy?
i just find it tough to have a relationship as a responsible adult in today’s economy. i earn a slightly above median income for fresh grad, and the amount that i earned is barely enough to pay tuition loan, pay bills and insurances, buy groceries and cook myself. cant even afford to eat out at hawker, and i cycle to work everyday to save money, literally no savings at all aside from CPF.
also work is super busy and tiring, everyday go home, shower, cook, eat, do chores, then time to sleep liao.
I asked around, some people say get married can double household income, but wouldnt the expenses also shoot up with housing, and money to have kids.
there are also others that say relationship isnt all about money, some people dont mind living frugal, but i just cant get into the mindset of burdening someone else with my financial struggles.
Update: im setting aside 2k each month for tuition loan. i want to pay off that asap since its collecting interest.
without giving away my income, lets jus assume 4.5k, thats 3600 into bank. minus 2k tuition loan thats 1.6k remaining.
i give my mum $700 every month as ”rent” for staying with her, and i pay 200+ every month for health insurance and internet and other monthly misc services.
thats $500+ left for food and transport which i spend $300+ on food and $50 on transport which leaves me almost no money given that i dont earn 4.5k.
Netizens’ comments
- If you’re at median income (assuming 4.5 excl. employer’s CPF), and with no savings
That’s a pretty high amount of expenditure, what you have mentioned are must spends, not sure whether you’re missing anything else.
You didn’t mention rent, but if you do have it, downsize I suppose, something has to give.
And in relation to dating? If there’s a will there’s a way (without going heavily in debt) - I guess all in all main thing is.. it is not a must to find a relationship ba. So if u don’t want it, no need find lor. But if u wan it, want to have companionship etc. You got to work on the concerns u have about finding one and then start looking.
I’m a person who don’t like to spend. Managed to find someone via the app who is a very suibian person. And tbh we have never eaten fine dining before lol cause we find not worth and like not filling haha. Coffee shop > fine dining anytime.
As I see your situation, the loans that you have + housing (since you’re somewhat covering your mum as well), ultimately it will be cleared one day and I think some of your concerns will be relieved by then plus your salary definitely will not be stagnant. So if you really want to find, maybe give it some time? - For some people, being in a stable and genuine relationship is food they need for their soul that cannot be valued by monetary measures alone.