Hi all, advice needed. So sorry for the long post ahead.
My mom and me have always been very close so I have always talked to her about my day since she always ask about it. So my typical topic of discussion with her is usually about life, school, personal relationships and work etc. Ever since she married my dad 40 years ago, she quite frequently got verbally abused by my dad due to his bad temper so she’ll rant to me about it too. The only reason she stayed with my dad was because he provided well for the family.
However, recently I had been seeing some changes in my mom. When I have a topic of discussion with her, it started with her sometimes getting irritated with me within 15 minutes if she isn’t in a good mood. Within a span of a year, this had worsened to her everyday getting irritated when I’m discussing topics halfway by at most the 10 minutes mark. Ok, i admit I have an inquisitive nature so I tend to ask a lot of questions during discussions, but this had never been an issue with my mom for the past 20 plus years of my life until only recently. When I asked her why, she said recently she felt physically and mentally tired, and she have no interest to talk for too long even to her siblings. Since she’s tired, I suggested talking another day but she refused.
On top of this, her language had became a lot more vulgar when she used to avoid using vulagarities in the past. And her language had became a lot more extreme. When I complained about certain people at work, I was only looking for advice to solve the problem but she would suddenly use extreme language and said “YOU WANT ME TO TAKE A KNIFE AND STAB THROUGH HER CB???” Basically, she is no longer the mild-tempered person I once knew.
It had also became more frequent that sometimes when I asked her something, she looked like she completely zoned out so she don’t reply me, or she would answer me a totally different thing so it made me wonder if she’s listening or she don’t understand my questions.
She is also starting to say things which makes no sense. When male colleagues talked to me and its just about work, she immediately suggested that maybe they’re interested in me. I know it’s definitely not the case so I tried to correct her thinking and she got irritated at me. She also said nonsense like if only I have a husband, nasty colleagues wouldn’t have targeted me at work.
Lastly, I noticed she seems to have become more forgetful. The most recent incident was she told me to retrieve an item from the left cupboard but I couldn’t find it. She said she told me to put in the left cupboard but I insisted my stand that I was not the one who kept it. Then she got irritated at me again and said “NEXT TIME THINGS YOU KEEP LAH!!” She looked for the item and it turned out to be on the right side cupboard and she’s actually the one who kept it, not me. I mean if she forgot and I was only repeating my stand that I really didn’t keep the item, why the need to get irritated at me?
I don’t even dare to bring up this point about her being forgetful recently, because I know she’ll get defensive and retort “MAYBE NEXT TIME YOU HAVEN’T REACH MY AGE AND YOU’LL BE WORSE THAN ME!!”
In summary, my mom seems to have become an easily irritable person. If it helps, she’s currently in her early 70s and she have hypertension which is well-controlled by medicine.
Are the above problems caused by a much shorter attention span due to her age? And is her behavior listed above just a normal part of aging and a simple matter of her being tired, or is there something more I need to be concerned about? Sadly, I couldn’t bring up about seeking professional help because I know she’ll get very defensive.
Thank you for reading and would appreciate any advice given.