My fiancée asked me to choose between her and my mom, and I chose my mom.
My mom turned 60 this year, and she is not going to live 5 years longer. 12 years ago she had a stroke, that left her half side paralyzed.
She still lives alone, and takes care of herself completely by herself. She is very resilient, and I am incredibly proud for her, but I know that her chances of living for another 5 years are very low.
My fiancee got, surprisingly, a promotion in the dream job she always wanted. Saying it’s a GIGANTIC opportunity would be saying that a Ferrari is just a car.
It’s a once-in-a-lifetime chance. It will change her life forever. It will fullfill everything she wanted, it will make her rich.
It also involves her moving countries, thousands of kilometres away. There is no way she won’t accept it, and I wouldn’t want her too.
The moment she told me about it, I knew it was over. She asked me to come with her, I didn’t even need to think about it and said no. It broke me apart, and it broke her apart, and I feel nothing and simultaneously just pain.
My mother has 5 years left, at best, then she will die, and just … never be in my life again.
For the rest of my existence until oblivion also swallows me up, I will never get to meet her again, hear her living voice again, she will be gone forever, just gone.
The clock is ticking for her, every day a bit louder, and I can not, simply can not, move away from her, and see her only once a year any more. How could I accept that only seeing her 5 times before she stop existing? I cannot. Period.
This is the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do, but it wasn’t a hard choice at all. I want to stab myself.