I am getting married to my fiance in a few months time.
I was adopted when I was a baby and my adoptive parents (50s) did their best to raise me and support me till I finished poly. We always had a good relationship and I obviously love them.
When I was 23 I decided to search for my biological parents, and long story short they were teenagers when they had me. They are still together and they have 2 more children. They said they wanted to keep me but they couldn’t raise me so they decided to put me up for adoption. The thing that really hurt me was that in my childhood and teenage years they tried to contact my adoptive parents and have a relationship with me, but my adoptive parents refused.
When I confronted my adoptive parents they said that they were afraid that I might prefer my biological parents, so they tried to keep them away.
I was hurt and disappointed and decided to go low contact. Over the years we managed to build a better relationship but it’s not like before.
So for my wedding, I decided to ask my biological father to walk me down the aisle and he obviously said yes. When my adoptive parents learnt it they were hurt and said that their worst fear had come to reality and if I insist to put my biological parents before them then I shouldn’t invite them to the wedding.
My answer was that they are not invited then. Since then all my adoptive family are calling me a bad daughter.
Here are what netizen thinks:
So I’m adopted, have a really decent relationship with my birth mom, and i really think you are in the wrong path. You cant really ever change who your family is.
Obviously you’re going to do whatever you want to do, but think about who you’re hurting when you do it. It sounds like you don’t have adoptive siblings (which I could be totally wrong about), so this will be their only child’s wedding. In their eyes, you are their daughter. They taught you everything.
What they did was wrong but understandable. What you are doing is rude and heartless. You said they were good parents and yet you let one mistake ruin your relationship.