This happened at new year’s but I’m still getting scolded for it so here we are.
My brother has 2 kids with his ex wife. Ever since they split he’s been constantly saying she’s a terrible mother who doesn’t know anything about the kids and doesn’t deserve any custody of them, but the examples he gives for this seem to me like moments of absent-mindedness.
Things like her giving a wrong date of birth (she said 8th instead of 18th, then corrected herself), forgetting which kid interest is which cartoon, not knowing one of them only eats one flavor of a particular food, and buying the wrong flavor.
I know his ex, and from what I’ve seen she’s a great mom. So unless I’m seriously missing something, it seems like my brother is just exaggerating to make her look bad. I’ve also always had a sneaking suspicion that he doesn’t know very much about his kids.
His wife had them for new year’s and I figured he’d have a lot to say about it, so I found out some info about the kids and when he started claiming his ex knows nothing about the kids and is therefore a terrible mother I quizzed him on his kids. It was pretty simple stuff, favorite toys, teacher’s names, allergies, favorite colors, favorite TV shows, what they want to be when they grow up. He didn’t do very well. Incidentally, my other brother and sister knew all of that information about their own kids.
My brother was mad at me then and is still mad at me over 2 weeks later. My parents say I need to apologize for embarrassing him in front of the whole family. I think if he was gonna claim his ex knows nothing about their kids and that makes her a bad mom, he should be prepared to demonstrate that he actually knows things about them.
Should I apologize?
Here are what netizens think:
- This! He’s mad because you’ve highlighting an issue that he’s uncomfortable with about himself. His anger is clearly deflected embarrassment about himself. If he comes to you for another apology I’d double down and let him know how transparent he is. He’s letting his children down and making a show of himself.
- Better still tell him you will apologize if he can tell you the answer to a question about his kids.
- Yep and tbh, I would think he’s probably a bit of a narcissist. Seems like he’s trying to get out ahead of it