I (F29) don’t feel attracted to my husband (M35) anymore
My husband and I have been together for four years and married for two. When we met, he was in shape, took me out often, spoiled me with gifts, took me on trips, held doors open, and was an all-around gentleman.
Fast forward four years later, and he’s overweight, is a rude and belligerent drunk, has punched holes in the wall while drunk and angry, has an explosive temper, never takes me out anymore, constantly demeans me, and makes me feel like I don’t matter.
The other day, he took me out for dinner for the first time in months, and I mentioned that this was a rare occurrence.
I spoke of the old days and how he used to treat me. He laughed and said he was doing what he had to do back then to get me to be with him.
I feel lied to and taken advantage of. I don’t know what to do and am drifting away from him. I don’t like it when he touches me anymore.
I don’t want him to kiss me, and when we do get intimate in bed, I pray that it’s over soon and imagine that it’s someone else. Is there any way to fix this, or will I always be unhappy if I stay with him? I don’t know.
Netizens’ comments
- Stop wasting your time and leave
- He has told you to your face you are an “object’ to him and your happiness means nothing to him. He won the ‘object’ you and now his work is done.
He sounds dangerous so get your stuff together and make a plan to leave without warning. - His mask has come off and he’s not even pretending otherwise. This is the true him.
It’s sad to know you were manipulated into being “trapped” in a marriage. But you aren’t trapped and now is the time to leave him. Before he becomes abusive. Speaking of which, prepare EVERYTHING, make a plan, get out, and then give him the papers. He may lash out if you mention divorce. - It’s not going to get better. Might as well leave now.
- He was comfortable enough to tell you he lied because he thinks he has you right where he wants AND YOU ARE GOING NOWHERE. Start making your plans to leave. Secretly. Warning you that as soon as he knows you are done he will “change” for the better. Don’t fall for it. It is love bombing.