My wife and I (28m and 26f) have been married for over two years now. We both have promising careers but neither of us are making a ton of money yet; we’ve been largely living paycheck to paycheck since we got together.
We’ve been sleeping on a way too old mattress and box spring since we got married that she inherited from some family member, and we’ve both been complaining about it. My side in particular has had a bad spring which was constantly digging into my side or lower back. We’ve both been researching mattresses and have agreed that we need to buy something new and better as soon as we are able.
So, anyway, a couple of weeks ago I went back home to attend my cousin’s wedding. My wife wasn’t able to go because she couldn’t get off work. When I got home my wife told me to go look in the bedroom. When I went I saw a new mattress on top of a new adjustable frame. It was wrapped in a red ribbon. My wife followed me in and said “Ta da!” When I asked her what was going on she told me that she had been slowly socking away money from her paychecks to buy a new bed, and that she had gone ahead and bought a nice, new, hybrid mattress with an adjustable frame so that we could watch TV in bed together. She seemed really excited about it.
I, however, wasn’t happy. I told her that a mattress was a major purpose and that we should have decided it together to make sure that it was something that we both liked. She said that she was really disappointed in my response and that she’d wanted to surprise me by saving up her own money and buying something nice that we needed, and that she’d thought I’d be happy. She said that surely the new bed was better than the old and that I should just be grateful to be sleeping on something better since I didn’t have to put any money in.
But I think it was a major purchase and she should have talked to me first, even if she did use her own money.
Here are what netizens think:
- You’ve been complaining about the old mattress and now you’re complaining about the new one. What else do you want to control?
- Doesn’t seem like it was about money at all. It was about wanting input on where you’re gonna sleep for the next few years.
- I think I would be delighted at such a surprise after 2 YEARS of being poked by bad springs and a broken down mattress.