My BF (25M) told me (23F) that men are too tired after finishing in bed
My boyfriend and I have been dating over a year and are living together. He is the most caring man and he is far from a misogynist.
We had a discussion one day talking about male and female frustrations while dating. I think I brought up how frustrating it is for men to not try in bed to make the woman finish.
He said that men would love to play as long as they can, but after they finish they get so tired and are not interested anymore. This seems so selfish to me, but I didn’t really fight back on that.
Yesterday, we f-ed in the morning and he finished and I could tell he didn’t want to continue playing (to be fair I didn’t ask him to, and in the past he has continued after he’s finished if I ask but I HAVE to ask otherwise he won’t even if I’m being physically obvious that I still want it).
I thought back to that thing he said and I was annoyed but I told myself that if I won’t ask for it I can’t really be mad at him because mavbe he just doesn’t know I want it even if I think I’m being obvious.
I went to the shower and finished myself. Then throughout the morning he was not listening to me. He would start watching videos as I was speaking to him.
We both do this sometimes and we’ve talked about it before calmly and we try not to get worked up about it because it’s unintentional.
But it set me off yesterday and I was so angry at him and needed to take space (I just went to get ready for the day).
He noticed I was upset and asked me to talk about it, asked to wait so I didn’t respond angrily and could talk about it calmly.
Later when I brought it up he immediately said “I WAS listening” which shut me down. He apologized for that response.
I think his perspective on intimacy is what triggered me most yesterday and the other things then bothered me more than they usually would.
Our discussion happened a while ago though. I just need to know if I’m in the wrong for thinking his view point is selfish? And I need advice on how to get through this argument we’ve had