I’m 29, and I’ve been working at this SME for a few years. My boss is 38. We’ve been seeing each other privately for a while, and honestly, I fell hard. He’s stable, successful, and treats me better than any guy my age ever has. The catch? He’s married. They’ve been together for years but they don’t have any kids.
Well, now I’m pregnant.
When I told him, I was terrified he’d ghost me or block me on MS Teams and tell HR to fire me. But he didn’t. He said he would be “fully responsible” and cover all the medical expenses—private hospital, prenatal checkups, everything. He even promised to fast-track my promotion during the next appraisal cycle so I’ll have a higher basic salary to “take care of the baby’s future.”
The problem is the “wife” situation. Every time I ask him if he’s going to leave her, he gives me these vague, corporate-speak answers. He says things like “it’s complicated” or “give me time to settle the assets.” He has never directly said the word divorce.
My friends (the few who know) are telling me to wake up. They say a “promotion” is just hush money to keep me quiet and stay in the company where he can watch me. But I can’t just quit. With a baby on the way, I need the increment, the maternity benefits, and the job security. I’ve already decided I want to keep the baby because I truly love him and I feel like this child is the only tether I have to him.
But am I just a “Side B” being kept in a gilded cage? Is there actually a chance he will choose us over his childless marriage, or am I just being played by a man who wants to have his cake and eat it too? I feel like I’m stuck in a local drama plot, but the stakes are my entire life. I’m scared, I’m hormonal, and I’m tired of being the secret in the office.
Has anyone actually seen a situation like this work out in Singapore, or am I just setting myself up to be a single mom while he goes home to his wife every night?
TL;DR: Pregnant by my married boss. He’s paying for everything and promising a promotion, but won’t commit to a divorce. Keeping the baby and staying at the job. Am I delusional?