Nowadays scrolling through Facebook or Sgcarmart is just a test of my blood pressure. Every single car dealer advertisement is a masterclass in absolute bullsh*t. They think Singaporeans so easily hoodwinked is it?
Let’s talk about their classic, clickbait mathematics.
You see one huge glowing font: “Drive home today at only $1,000/month!” Wow, cheap right? Sounds like a steal! Then you PM the salesman, and he hit you with the reality check: “Eh bro, this one need 50% downpayment hor.”
KNN, if I have $80,000 cold hard cash sitting around for a deposit, do you think I need your “budget-friendly” $1,000 monthly installment? Might as well ask me to pay the whole car in cash, then monthly installment is $0! Genius right?
Then on the other side of the spectrum, you see: “$0 DEPOSIT! WALK AWAY WITH CAR TODAY!”
Wah, music to my ears. No need cough up cash. But wait, you look at the monthly installment… $3,000 per month. Siao liao. For a basic, COE-depreciating Japanese sedan, you want me to pay $3k a month for 10 years? That’s not a car loan, that’s a second housing loan, bro. By the time the loan finish, the car scrape already, and I’m still paying for the air inside the tires.
The funniest part? These clowns will put “$1,000/month” and “$0 Deposit” on the EXACT SAME POSTER. Mix and match until become rojak. They phrase it until it looks like you can get both at the same time. When you go down to the showroom, they play the “Oh, that one is Option A, this one is Option B” card. Mislead people until like that, no police catch meh?
And don’t even get me started on the “FREE 10-YEAR WARRANTY”.
This one is the biggest scam of the century. First of all, half of these parallel importer or second-hand car companies won’t even survive the next 3 years. One day you drive past, the shop unit change become a hotpot restaurant already. Go where find your 10-year warranty?
Even if they stay open, the fine print will strangle you. “Must exclusively service at our authorized workshop every 10,000km.” Then one normal oil change they charge you $400-500. If you change a wiper blade outside, boom, warranty void. It’s not a warranty, it’s a 10-year subscription plan to get chopped by their workshop!
Seriously, buying a car in SG is stressful enough with the COE prices. Can these dealers just be transparent for once? Stop the financial gymnastics and just tell us the actual price!