Need to vent before I pack my bags and move into a tent at East Coast Park.
Back in 2022, my (33M) wife (31F) and I were blessed to collect the keys to our 5-room resale flat. We spent a good $70k on renovation to turn it into our cozy dream home.
Just two months after we moved in, my mother-in-law and father-in-law dropped a bombshell. They were selling their old 3-room flat to “downsize” and asked if they could stay with us “temporarily for 3 to 6 months” while their new unit was undergoing renovation.
Since they are family, I said sure, no problem lah. What’s 6 months right? I wanted to be a good son-in-law.
FAST FORWARD TO 2026. IT HAS BEEN FOUR FREAKING YEARS. 💀💀
Not only have they NOT bought a new flat, but they haven’t even been looking! The “temporary” arrangement has officially become a permanent fixture, and my house doesn’t feel like my house anymore.
Here’s a daily snapshot of my life:
- Zero Privacy: My MIL treats our master bedroom like a public corridor. She walks in without knocking to drop off folded laundry or “check on the aircon.”
- Living Room Takeover: My FIL monopolizes the TV from 8 AM to 11 PM watching old Channel 8 dramas on maximum volume. I haven’t watched a movie on my own couch in years.
- Kitchen Dictatorship: My MIL cooks every single meal, refuses to let me or my wife touch the stove, and then complains that she is “slaving away like a maid for the family.”
- Financial Drain: Our SP Services utility bills are through the roof because the aircon runs 24/7. Guess who pays 100% of the bills? Yours truly.
Whenever I bring this up with my wife in private, she gets super defensive. She says: “They are old already, why you so heartless? How to ask my own parents to move out? Later people say I not filial!”
Walao eh! Filial piety is one thing, but squatting in your daughter’s home indefinitely under false pretenses is another! They literally sold their own flat, collected a huge sum of cash proceeds, and are now living rent-free, bill-free, and stress-free at the expense of my sanity and our marriage!
We can’t even plan for kids because every single bedroom in our 5-room flat is occupied by their barang-barang!
I feel like a tenant paying a full mortgage just to rent a single room in my own home.
Am I being unreasonable for wanting my own space back after FOUR YEARS, or am I expected to just bite the bullet until… well, forever? How do you nicely tell your in-laws to pack up and move out without causing a total family war? Sibei helpless sia.