Last night we were hanging out at ION Orchard, right outside the Chanel store. She was staring at one quilted leather flap bag like it was the Holy Grail. Out of nowhere, she turn to me, sigh super loud, and say: “Babe, look at that… so elegant. All my friends’ boyfriends buy for them during anniversary. You never buy luxury bag for me before.”
I look at the price tag. $14,000.
FOURTEEN THOUSAND DOLLARS. For a bag that can barely fit an iPhone 15 Pro Max and one lip balm?
My brain instantly converted that into real-world value:
- 3,500 plates of Chicken Rice (with extra meat)
- 46 months of HDB BTO installment
- 1 whole return flight to Europe with business class seat
So naturally, being a practical Singaporean guy, I tried to introduce some logic into the conversation. I pointed to the woven NTUC FairPrice reusable tote bag sticking out of her canvas tote.
I told her, “Babe, be realistic lah. You put tissue paper inside Chanel, it holds tissue paper. You put tissue paper inside NTUC bag, it ALSO holds tissue paper. NTUC bag even got water-resistant coating, handle won’t snap, and if dirty can just wash with Dettol. Chanel rain hit a bit only you will cry like father die. NTUC bag is superior engineering what.”
Bro. The look she gave me… if looks could kill, my COE would have expired on the spot.
She never say anything. Just crossed her arms, walked straight to the MRT, tapped in, and took the train home. Didn’t even wait for me. Sent me a WhatsApp at 11 PM saying: “It’s not about the bag, it’s about whether you value me.”
Now she blue-ticking me since morning. I even offered to compromise and get her the special edition Don Don Donki yellow bag because it has cute penguin on it. She blocked me on Instagram.
Is this end game already? Or should I go down to Sheng Siong and buy the $0.20 plastic bag to wrap around my head? Please advise.