Okay hear me out before you all downvote me to oblivion in the comments.
I’m an average 24F, maybe a solid 6/10 on a good day if I do my makeup properly, put on a nice outfit, and the humidity in SG doesn’t destroy my hair within 5 minutes of stepping out of the MRT. I’m not ugly, but I’m definitely not those NUS/NTU influencer-types who get free stays at Marquee and 50k followers just by doing a fit check. When I go out with my pretty female friends (those legit 8s and 9s), I am literally invisible. Zero eyes on me. I become the designated photographer taking 500 photos of them at cafes while guys bring them free drinks.
Recently I noticed a pattern. I’ve become quite close with a group of female friends from uni who are severely obese (hard truth, but visually maybe a 1 or 2/10). We hang out quite often for hotpot and standard cafe hops. And every single time we go out together, I notice a huge difference.
Whenever we walk through orchard or hang around Bugis, guys will actually look at me. Not just glance, but full-on eye contact and double takes. The other day when we were ordering bubble tea, a guy in line literally started small talk with me. If I was with my 9/10 friends, that guy wouldn’t even register my presence.
It feels like some kind of visual magic trick, but I know there’s a proper term for this. Is this the famous “cheerleader effect” or contrast effect in psychology? Basically, placing myself next to people who are far less physically attractive instantly inflates my perceived value. By contrast, I look like a total standout.
I lowkey feel a bit guilty because I realise I’ve been initiating meetups with them more often partly because of how good and confident it makes me feel when we walk in public. Am I a toxic person for consciously using my friends as human props to boost my own ego? Anyone else experienced this “visual contrast” hack in SG?