Posting here because I really don’t know who to talk to without making things super awkward.
For context, we’ve been married for about 6 years, no major issues, standard Singaporean HDB life. A few months back, my wife (38F) suddenly became super health-conscious. Said she wanted to start doing yoga and core strengthening to clear her back pain and lower body fat. Fair enough right? Good for her.
She bought all those aesthetic Lululemon activewear sets and signed up for private 1-on-1 personal training sessions at a boutique studio in town. Started going religiously twice a week, rain or shine. Even on days when she was tired from work, she would still rush down.
At first I was supportive, but then things started feeling a bit off. She became super defensive about her schedule. Every time I asked simple stuff like “How was class today?” or “What posture you all practice?”, she would give super short answers like “Just deep stretching lor, you won’t understand one.” Then last week, I went to collect a package near her studio around the time her session was supposed to end, so I decided to drop by to surprise her and grab dinner together.
Walked past the glass windows and saw her. No yoga mat in sight.
She was at the free weights section with this young trainer—looks around 21 or 22 only, fresh out of NS kind of gym bro. They were not doing yoga at all. He was standing extremely close, guiding her squat form with his hands on her hips, both of them laughing and flirting like secondary school kids. When the set finished, she touched his arm and they were taking selfies together.
I stood outside for a solid two minutes just freezing. Didn’t make a scene because I didn’t want to embarrass myself in public, so I just walked away.
When she came home later, I casually asked, “How was yoga?” She looked straight at me without blinking and said, “Siam tone class today, very tiring, my instructor say my flexibility getting better.”
I haven’t confronted her yet because I want to process this properly. Is this full-blown emotionally cheating already, or am I overthinking? Should I just confront her directly, or go retrieve the studio schedule first? Really headache, any bro or sis here went through similar situation before?