I’m 29 and friend, Bella (both in early 30s) have been friends for the last 5 years or so. We live 1hr away from each other but we see each other a few times a year.
Normally in a trip we discuss a menu, grocery shop/split bill and cook together.
The last 6 times we’ve hung out it’s been us driving to them since she was pregnant with her daughter. Now when I found out she was prego I was so excited. I contacted local mom friends in my community and got tons of clothes (maternity and baby), toys, books, diapers, even a few large baby furniture for them.
Literally a couple of carloads. I helped decorate and paint babies room (personally purchased several things). I went all out for the shower including a generous gift.
All these things are done in love, I don’t believe in strings attached to gifts but I do feel this is relevant to my judgment.
So. The issue. Last time I was set to visit.
Bella asked if my hubby could help her hubby in some heavy-duty outside labour. no big deal, he was happy to help. (But this would normally cost a lot for outside hire)
Ready to go. She sends me a message asking if we could split their grocery bill for the weekend. Mind you, we pay X amount in petrol, X amount for house/pet sitting. Plus a few other hoops to jump through just for a weekend. Also. EVERY time we visit we bring something, often food-wise. We are less financially stable than them at this juncture (if that matters)
Idk it just pissed me off. They’ve come for dinner before and I never would have even thought to ask for money! Anyone really. Come over I’ll feed you.
It’s not like it was steak and lobster either… Its just some spaghetti and leftovers.
I feel like I’ve done a lot for them and I’m not even worth a meal.
I told her sorry. I couldn’t afford that on top of everything else it costs just to visit.
She was pretty mad. So am I just being way too sensitive? What kind of friend is this?
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