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Friday, October 7, 2022
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GF FROM USA EXPECTS SG BF TO BE EXCITED FOR GOING TO USA, THINKS HE “SUA KU”

My partner’s family lives in the US and we’re going to see them soon (few weeks).

I’m going with her because she wants me to be there. I’ve already met all the families that “matters” as they visit where we live.

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I don’t mind going so much, it’s not a place I want to visit but it’ll be nice to see her dad again, we get on okay. We have had to postpone going away just us which both me and my partner were bummed out about but priorities for her are seeing her family, it’s mainly due to cost, shelling out to visit her Dad wasn’t exactly the way I planned on spending my holiday fund this year so the planning for our holiday has had to be pushed back until early/mid next year.

She also booked the flights differently than we originally agreed, taking up my entire holiday allowance for the year and extra, which means I have to take a day unpaid and I have to be back at work <10 hours after landing back.

My partner sat me down and asked why I wasn’t as excited as her about the trip. I explained that visiting her family isn’t particularly exciting to me and I’d much rather go on holiday together somewhere together than spend that money and holiday time to see her family (which is the point I feel I may have sounded like an ah).

But that it was important to her for me to go so it’s important to me and so I’ll go. That doesn’t necessarily mean I’ll be hopping like an excited kid but it doesn’t mean I don’t want to go (I don’t but we’re not telling her that).

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She then found out that I’d been to the US before and this seemed to deflate her a little? I asked if she thought that’s why I’d be excited and she said no but it was fairly clear that she thought I was excited to go to the US and was disappointed I’d been there before.

She got upset, argumentative and spiralled a little from there… tbh I kinda felt like she hadn’t listened to my side of the story and just got upset but she thinks that I’m an outright bad person for not being excited about going to see her family.. but am I wrong?

I feel like I’ve done my best to accommodate what she wants even though it’s not what I want. She thinks I’m an Asian mountain tortoise that has never travelled before.

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