I dated this older guy (34yo and I’m 27) for a few months and he lived at my place. He still paid for his rent at his place, but he stayed with me because I live in 2 bedder apartment by myself. We did house chores equally. The only exception was laundry, I agreed to do the laundry, ironing and putting back clothes to the closet. I didn’t mind it because I’m pretty particular with separating laundry as well as ironing every single thing including bed sheets and quilt covers. It’s a little too much, but I grew up in a family that does it and I am not asking anyone to help me do it.
One time I was on call for a week, so I decided to sleep on the sofa in the second bedroom so that I wouldn’t wake him up every time I get a call.
I just changed the bed sheet and the quilt cover earlier that week and hadn’t slept on it ever since. One night before bed, I came to him to say goodnight and I saw the quilt was very crumpled and the bed was messy. So I scolded him for making it messy.
He then joked around and wrapped himself with the blanket and rolled with it all over the bed. I was annoyed and said “fine you can do that as long as you iron it tomorrow”.
He got mad immediately because of what I said and said “if you ask me to iron, then I don’t want to sleep here anymore!”. I was taken aback by what he said, but because it was already late I cut it short and just say good night and went to the other room.
In the morning, he woke me up to ask if I wanted to go to the park with my dog. I was still pissed so I told him that what he said last night was childish as I spent hours ironing the bed sheets and quilt covers and all I asked was for him to be considerate and not make it crumpled on purpose; but instead of saying sorry, he threatened to not stay with me anymore.
After I finished my sentences, he threatened to leave again for the same reason, “if I can’t roll on the bed, I cannot stay here anymore”. And then he insisted that we need to discuss about the rolling on the bed rules because he still wanted to do it (btw we were already living together for 5 months and this was never an issue).
And he also said he was not gonna comply with my request because then I’m changing him as a person. he said that we were just different, he’s just the kind of person that likes to roll on his bed, and if he can’t have that he’s not going to be happy.
FYI, I never mind it if the bed gets messy when he sleeps, it’s something that he can’t control. I’m also okay if he rolls as long as he doesn’t wrap himself in the blanket when he does it. The thing that I’m most troubled with is the fact that he doesn’t appreciate the effort I put in to make the bed feels nice to sleep in and his response to the request that I think is rational, which is not to roll around intentionally to make it all crumpled, is just ridiculous.
It’s just something that I would never imagine fighting about with an adult.
submitted by /u/strangerOnReddit8
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