I (F21) am a student with no income. My boyfriend of 2 years (M23) runs his own company and makes quite a lot of money.
A couple of months ago, we went on a trip that we paid for fifty-fifty. I really enjoyed it, but I basically spent all of my money on it.
My boyfriend now asked me if I wanted to go on another trip, to which I replied that I no longer had any money (he didn’t know the last trip made me broke).
He replied that he didn’t care and that he could pay for everything since he wanted to go and would much rather go there with me than alone, even if he had to pay.
I refused because I didn’t want to feel like I was living off his money. He got offended by the fact that I wouldn’t allow him to pay for the trip.
I usually have no problem with him paying for dinner or other small things, but a trip is too much to accept.
Netizens’ comments
- Depends on how he reacts to spending money on you. Does he hold it against you? Use it as leverage for things you ‘owe’ him? If not, I would go and have fun. Life is pretty short and shitty, being able to enjoy things from time to time is what helps us all stay sane.
- If he offered out of consideration and love, no wonder he got offended. He still has to accept your decision though. You also have a right to feel the way you feel.
- This income disparity isn’t going to go away, though. And he isn’t going to stop wanting nice things, fun trips, decent meals, etc. because you’re skint. If it really is a big issue for you, then it may end up driving a wedge between you before long. Sometimes, it’s just nice to accept a gift in the way it is intended.
- I understand not wanting to have him pay for it. But this isn’t just about you, it’s also about him and what he wants. A trip for 1 person costs $X. A trip for two people costs $2X. He has $2X to spend and would immensely enjoy a trip with his girlfriend more than he would a trip alone.