My (F23) boyfriend (M27) keeps hanging out with his ex, who is now his best friend, and it’s making me uncomfortable
Context: my boyfriend and I met in our student building, we’ve been together for 4 months, practically living together.
I’m a student and I go home for the weekend, and a couple of weeks ago a picture of him, his ex and her friends pops up on Instagram. I was hurt and asked him to tell me when he would meet up with her, which he agreed to.
This weekend, I call him up in the evening and it turns out they went to eat sushi together, then they went to her place to study and ended up watching a movie. He did not tell me any of this and told me it was bc it was quite spontaneous. We call to talk things through, and everything is fine again, but an hour later I get a message from his ex (first ever message she’s sent me) saying that I shouldn’t be concerned, that nothing would happen between them.
Now, I’m absolutely shocked. My boyfriend knows his relationship with her is a very big insecurity of mine, and now he’s apparently decided to share that with her. I really don’t want to be the girlfriend that keeps him away from his best friend, but their relationship is hurting me a lot and I have trouble trusting him with this.
How should I handle this?
Netizens’ comments
- OP it sounds like he doesn’t care especially when all you’ve said you want him to do in terms of this, is to let you know when he’s hanging out with her. Have a conversation about that and if nothing changes, I’d just leave. If he doesn’t change it, he won’t change it. That’s all it appears you asked of him.
- Agree with the other responses let it go, move on and save yourself more heartache. You are a student and school is a great place to meet someone new.
- There is no easy way to say this. But it is in your best to break up with him. There is no relationship between you you BF if he is hanging out with his EX. Do not accept this level of disrespect .
- You’ve already asked him to let you know when he hangs with his ex. He did not do that this last time, claiming it was spontaneous, as if he doesn’t have a cell phone. He didn’t bother to tell you despite knowing that you felt insecure about their “friendship”.
You’ve already made your requests. He has now shown you what he was willing to do with the requests & information you’ve given him concerning his ex: absolutely nothing. He doesn’t care & will continue to hang with her. He likely wouldn’t have told you the first time if the picture never showed up on insta.
He’s established the amount of Fs he gives, so now you have to establish what you wish to do with those Fs.