He (18M) was a scrawny teenager when we first started dating, girls didn’t really go for him either. He got sick of being skinny, wanted to get big. I (18F) motivated him into being consistent with the workouts and diet changes he went through. I was there for him and supported him emotionally when those dirty bulks and cuts had him feeling all difficult.
It paid off. He got really fit. Girls started throwing themselves at him. He curved all of them at first (although he did admit to flirting with some girl, which I stupidly allowed because I didn’t want to come off as the crazy, jealous girlfriend). Then came my last year in school. I needed time to focus more on myself and my education. I needed to get really busy. We had been on breaks before so I wasn’t that worried in asking for one. I had stayed loyal when he used to ask for breaks when life got super busy for him, so I figured he’d obviously do the same.
It all came crashing down on me, though. We were on a call, and I broke everything down to him. He stayed silent, like he’d been waiting for this to happen (I had mentioned we might need to do this before). Not phased, he says, “Can I talk to other girls while you’re away?” I immediately reply back, “Of course.” Again, I just wanted to seem like the perfect, laid back girlfriend that was secure in herself and her man.
And I was, I never for a second doubted that I was anything less than his dream girl. Until his conversations with me afterwards consisted of backhanded compliments like, “You’ve no idea how many girls I’ve ignored for you.” and so on. I had laughed and said he couldn’t even talk to other women, not taking him seriously. He then proceeded to text some girls. I cried afterwards. I didn’t cry because of his borderline cheating (at least not mainly lmfao), but because how different the girls looked compared to me. They were all skinny with size 0 waists and A-cups, whereas I’ve got a bigger chest and thicker thighs. Fuller.
He said I had asked for it by provoking him when we called later that night, and never really apologized for it; his way of comforting me was by saying I’d never be replaceable. It did comfort me to some extent, but it hasn’t been the same since.
He’s admitted to talking to one specific girl. He refused to tell me her name, but showed me a picture of hers, and low and behold, skinny with a conventionally attractive face. Oh, no, but it’s okay because the girl knows he’s taken, right? He decided to rub salt on the wound even further by mentioning how I couldn’t fathom how pretty her body was, and how he wouldn’t share. I’m realizing how sick it is just now, even though according to him, he stopped what they had soon after.
He doesn’t really respond to me properly anymore. Uses curt replies. Then blames me when I mention how we never talk much these days. I know this is supposed to be a break. But it’s a break on MY end, so why is he the one acting unavailable instead?
He was never like this when he was skinny. We used to go on breaks when life got hectic but we would always technically be together. He would be loyal.
He says he loves me but that’s about it. He doesn’t find me attractive and he never shows love to me anymore. Doesn’t care when i send him photos anymore. He used to go crazy for them and now it’s just… nothing.
The one thing I took pride in us for was our ability to communicate. Should I swallow my pride and ask him what’s up? Even if it might break my heart? We’ve been together for 3 years and I don’t want it to go down the drain.
If any man (or woman) is reading this mess of a story, is it because he’s all big and buff now? Or is it my fault in some way?
What do you guys think about this?