Hi guys, would need advice on whether I should stay in a “relationship” that I deem as toxic.
Basically, I’m not officially in a relationship with this guy but we’ve been together for almost 2 years. We fight so often & many times, the fights are very intense & aggressive. When things escalate, he would usually shout at me while standing close to me & face down to me (i don’t really know how to describe his stance; but it’s an aggressive stance). When he does this, I wouldn’t even back down & would face him head on and fight it out with him (i admit my words can be too harsh during these kind of fights & note that my temper are really bad so sometimes i maybe the one that escalated the fight).
But ya, he raised his hands during a few of these fights but have never actually laid hands on me. He’d usually end up throwing my stuff across the room, snatching my phone away to make me stay (because i’d usually try to leave the room & get away from him), or he’d smash stuff. Just to note, he does not raise his hand/ throw or smash stuff/ snatch my phone in every single fight. It’s only during these very intense ones, but these happened probably more than 6-7 times during the 2 years – and 1 time in public.
Other than these intense fights, we also have very frequent long & random fights (heated but not as intense as the above).
These are the things that I can’t accept but at the same time, when things are good he’d be really very nice to me. He’d always tolerate me & gives in to me. He’d buy me stuff that I wanted to purchase myself to surprise me when I asked him for opinions on which item is nicer. He’d also always bring me to eat any food that I’m craving for & does many things that I want. Honestly, I would really settle down with him if not for the above stuff. I just don’t want to end up giving him a chance to actually hit me when our fight gets too intense? And I find that we fight way too often & too intensely with either willing to back down?
Oh on a side note, he snores REALLY loudly every night which disrupts my sleep so badly that I feel like murdering him sometimes. Any advice on how to make him stop snoring so that I can get some decent sleep when I’m with him would be greatly appreciated please!