So the other day, me and my usual kopi gang gathering at the kopitiam downstairs. Standard one — old school marble table, teh peng, and everybody complaining about COE, CPF, and HDB loan lah.
Then this guy Jason, you know the type — talk like he LinkedIn CEO, walk like Orchard Road is his runway. He come sit down, never even order drink, just straight drop bomb.
“Wah bro,” he say, “I just finish paying off my HDB loan leh. Age 34 only, bro. You all still slowly paying meh?”
The rest of us pause. Even Uncle Tan stop stirring his kopi O kosong.
“Wah, serious ah?” Ah Lim ask. “You kena 4D or Toto or what?”
Jason smirk. That kind of smirk that make you wanna throw teh peng at his face.
“Bro, you must plan ahead. Financial literacy, know? I buy my BTO smart-smart last time. Then last year my parents sponsor me $300,000 to clear the balance. So I just whack pay off everything lah.”
We all look at him. Stunned. Siao or what.
“Eh bro,” I say, “if I got $300K parachute from mummy and daddy, I also can pay finish leh. Maybe even buy another BTO in Tengah also can.”
Jason laugh. “That’s why I say lah, you must have solid financial foundation. I told my parents, don’t need wedding dinner, just give cash better. So now no loan, I free like bird.”
Ah Lim roll his eyes until can see his brain. “You ownself free, but your logic a bit siao lah. That one not financial planning. That one is family planning.”
Uncle Tan also mumble, “If I got $300K sponsor I also can be Warren Buffet already. You think all parents got extra $300K lying around meh?”
Jason still damn smug. “Aiyah, you all don’t be jealous lah. Work smart, not hard.”
Then his phone ring. He pick up and go, “Ma, you transfer liao not? Need top-up for reno leh.”
We all burst out laughing.
Jason quickly walk away.
I look at the rest and say, “Wah, this one not HDB owner. This one is HDB tenant under ‘parental subsidy scheme’ sia.”