My brother is a very hardworking man and at 27 he is now very wealthy and doing well for himself. He’s been with this girl for six months and throughout the time we have gotten close because we both like hair, makeup, and shopping.

I never knew there was anything wrong with their relationship except when she texted me last week I said she would love to hang out but thinks it’ll be inappropriate because she and my brother broke up.

I asked her why and she said she was sick and tired of “auditioning” to prove she was with him for the right reasons. She went on to say that my brother is paranoid she’s after his money so he would test her like

1. Leaving out his bank statements on their bed and getting upset when she picked it up
2. Going out to eat at high-end restaurants he requested and leaving his wallet on home at the purpose to make her pay the bill and prove she’s not going out with him for money
3. Never buying her gifts and questioning her when she asks why he doesn’t.

I was shocked so I had to hear my brothers perspective. We spoke and he told me everything she said was true and that there’s nothing wrong with making sure his girlfriend is with him for the right reasons.

He said he left his bank statements on the bed and was peeking through the door to see if she would be curious and when he saw her pick up the papers he knew in his gut she was using him for his money, so he set up the restaurant idea to see if she would get upset at paying a $500 bill which she was.

I asked him if he thinks her being an kindergarden school teacher could’ve contributed to her being upset at a $500 bill at a restaurant he wanted to go to and he said no.

He said the straw that broke was when she asked him why he hasn’t bought her a single gift since they’ve started dating when she bought him a gaming console and new rims for his car and he knew she was just discretely asking him to buy her an expensive gift.

He confronted her and said he thinks she’s with him for his money so she said let me do us both a favour and dumped him and block him. He’s upset about the “gold-digging B-” and when I laughed he called me an a**hole.

He said I would never understand what’s it’s like being a rich man and being used and I get that concern, but I told him if he thinks any woman will be okay with his tests and auditions he’s delusional as hell. If he doesn’t want to be used for his money he should start dating people as wealthy as him or leave lower income people alone if he’s not going to be genuine in his relationships unless they pass his “test”.

Speechlessness

TDLR, but the tea is worth the read.

I think I made the right decision to move on from my ex. He’s much older than me and we’ve together for a few years. At first I thought he’s a nice guy but now i am really understanding why he’s been single for all these years.

The fact that I put up with his behaviour for so long , it is an amazement.

He thinks that accompanying me to the doctor or fetching me from appointments (not nails / lashes) is me having the princess syndrome because his idea is me waiting for him at the pick up point early and when he drives up, I hop in and we go. He said that girls who want guys to wait for them is spoiled and just want to be pampered. But isn’t it normal that we wait for each other ?

To add on, he cannot stand it when people are more successful than him monetarily wise. He feels that parents should only give their kids X amount if parents make X+n , doing it more is just spoiling them. But logic, which parent wouldn’t want to give their best to their child ?? He also says that he always tries his best to lessen people’s money and supports the inheritance tax because he feels people should not be too rich. So the logic is when he cannot provide, he blames other people’s act of being able to provide spoiling/pampering (in a negative way).

Lastly, the bombshell. This is kind of absurd to me but he feels very scared that his child may be “wrongly taught” other religion or other religions snatch his child to them. Etc if he is of Y religion he should immediately bring his child up with Y religion or else other religions might “brainwash” his child to be their religion instead. When I asked him what is wrong with other religions ? He said it’s just wrong because he is brought up in a way where he has the duty to bring his child to his religion.

I mean there’s more but need I say more? The above 3 got me questioning my whole time wasted.

I am 23 y.o this year, I work as an admin in a local office and I draw about 2.3k after CPF. It’s not a lot of money but the reason I state my salary is important.

My boyfriend recently broke up with me after he said that “our relationship is not working”, he gave me various reasons that left me in heartbreak such as “I’m immature, I can’t cook” and many more.

A month went by and I heard from my friends that my ex-boyfriend has gotten together with an older woman. I was curious and asked my friends about it, they told me that the woman is 41-years-old! That is 17 years older than my ex-boyfriend and 18-years-old more than me.

After I CSI the woman’s online profile for a long time I finally found information on her, she don’t have an Instagram or Facebook account.

But she has a Linkedin account, she seems to be working some kind of job in a Bank and draws much more than me.

I stalk my ex’s Instagram and found out that he has been posting a lot of new branded clothes and even a car on his Instagram. When he was with me he was making slightly lesser money than me. It is not possible to even afford an Addidas T-shirt and now he has Givenchy and so much more branded stuff.

Obviously, his sudden showing of wealth on his social media attracted some attention. One of his close friends posted a comment on his Instagram photo “Good hor have a rich girlfriend”.

I confronted him and he told me that he don’t love the woman and the only reason he is being with her is money.

He said that he wanted to be together with me and take the woman’s money wealth at the same time. But it was not fair for me so he broke up with me.

He said that he has plans to patch things up with me once he has secured a good amount of money.

I was so pissed off and said

“hello?! You sold our relationship for money. That shows your priorities”.

I blocked him after that and we never got in contact anymore, last I heard he went from that older lady to another even older and richer one.

Job promotion

I have been in a company for more than 5 years. This company is known for its extremely slow progression so I had not been promoted even once, but the reason I stayed so long was because the colleagues are generally nice. There is also no OT pay for staying back late.

Due to poor management, our turnover rate have been very high, with an average of 6 people resigning per year. Because of this, my workload had increased significantly compared to when i first joined, on top of taking a bit of side projects. Therefore, I’m thinking of requesting for a promotion.

However, here come the problem, I also have a couple of hard-core colleagues who not only took on high workload, but is willing to take on more side projects by staying back late almost everyday even without OT pay or bringing work home sometimes. I only stayed back late once in a blue moon to complete really urgent stuff as I believe in work-life balance.

Now my question is, generally for promotion, is it dependent solely on my contribution over the years or does promotion works like a bell curve, which is relative to how I compare against my colleagues? If it’s the latter, does this mean I have no right to bring up promotion?

Here are what netizens think:

• Just be selfish, and take what you can get. Ask for promotion/increment/bonus. If they say no, and you think it unreasonable, just leave. Don’t be loyal to a faceless organization. Corporations are disgusting and are designed to cater to shareholders needs. As an employee, your most important value should be loyalty to yourself and talent. So basically the answer is, don’t compare yourself to your colleagues. Take what you think you deserve.

• You can try to look for any available job. Till u got one, then you can call the shots. In life, is no harm try to job search for better pay, better prospect, better environment. But, if you feel you like the present, then do your best. Can do some hinting here and there to respective superior.

• Promotion is not only dependent on your current work but what you are doing to improve the team or organization. Ask your manager what is expected of you to get promoted and work on that career progression. Never Request for promotion; that means you don’t know why you should be promoted. Build a list of your accomplishments every quarter and keep your manager in that loop. There are a lot of organizations where work-life harmony is awarded and appreciated, so look for opportunities outside your organization if working long hours is the only way your manager promotes people.

I find myself being an unwilling, distant audience to my upstairs neighbours’ intimate life.

They like to get down and dirty every Saturday night and Sunday morning. She is a screamer. The ceiling is thin enough that I can hear them walk from the bedroom to the kitchen.

So the screaming comes through loud and clear. But it sounds fake. It sounds like she learned what orgasms sound like from adult movies and is copying those noises but isn’t actually enjoying herself.

It often sounds painful and semi-violent and scary and like she is masking unhappiness with fake overly happy noises. It’s icky. I feel icky hearing it.

To drown them out I blast two fans on high speed and have a blue noise machine I put right next to my head.

It sort of does the trick but most Saturday nights I end up sleeping on my sofa to get away from them and where their main action is at.

I hate them. I really want to tell them to shut up and pipe down. But I’ve been advised that that would be unbeneficial and rude.

So I guess I’ll just keep trying to blast them out of my brain and keep my distance.

Netizens’ comments

• You need to blast ‘Who let the dogs out?’ on repeat at full volume every-time they screw!

• Record it this weekend, play it back at them full volume when they start next weekend.

• Bang the ceiling with the broom
• Choose an appropriate time to have a polite conversation with your neighbors. Be discreet and avoid approaching them immediately after the incident. Politely express your concerns, explaining that the noise is causing discomfort and disturbance in your living environment. Approach the conversation in a non-confrontational manner, focusing on finding a mutually agreeable solution.
• If you prefer to remain anonymous, you can write a polite, anonymous note to your neighbors, expressing your concerns about the noise level during certain times. However, it’s generally better to have a face-to-face conversation to establish a personal connection and resolve the issue more effectively.

People who stay in a toxic relationship, just why?

Like if every conversation leads to an a argument all the time, if one party is the only one giving effort, if one party don’t care about the other, if only one party being left to solve every problem, why stay at all? If you have nothing to lose, which most cases are like that, why bother staying at all?

Oh, it’s cause you’re trying to change that person. You’re trying to prove that you love them unconditionally. You’re trying to prove that you’re loyal no matter what. You’re waiting for the day for that person to really appreciate you cause you crave that so much.

That’s all it is.

Well, here’s the harsh truth : It’s your own fault for choosing to stay when you can leave. Least you can do is shut the eff up and stop feeling sorry for yourself. You picked them. Deal with it or leave.

Grow up, losers.

Here are what netizens think:

• You’re perfect I guess. You know the perfect solution to every relationship problem? You’re not in their relationship, you will never know the real reason why some people hang on. The most is you only know what people have told you and it’s only parts of it. This post just tells us that you are cruel, you have no empathy, no patience for people who have relationship problems. Hope you never ever need comfort from anyone when you’re in need. But from what I know, people who talk like this usually have the most issues. There’s already a lot of hate in the world, learn to find something to love and focus on. Hating on other people’s relationship problems won’t make yours go away. It’ll only distract you from yours momentarily.

• Maybe there are legitimate factors holding them back. Like money and children. Or other unknown variables. It’s not happened to you so it’s easy for you to dismiss. Might wanna be a bit less judgemental if you don’t have the full story. No one in their right mind would wish to stay on in an abusive toxic relationship if they can leave

• It depends on the context of the relationship, sometimes you don’t get to leave as you wish. There are responsibilities such as children and housing that does not allow one to leave as and when they want to. I know of a lady who had gone through divorce proceedings for a few years already, she had moved out of their matrimonial home and have yet to receive her portion of CPF contributions despite chasers from mutual friends to resolve things amicably. This means that she cannot purchase her own flat and can only rent a room outside. (Yes she has considered legal action but it is really just complicated.) See, so what if she left the relationship? If the other party wants to play punk, she will still be living in his toxicity.

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Dispute with MCST and residents on covered carpark lots

I bought a unit of a 8-unit only apartment building few year ago. There is a huge carpark but only 6 covered lots. And it is “choped” by the residents of 6 units who claimed they have been staying there earlier than me so they rightfully get these lots.

It hasn’t been an issue to me even though I have little kids that have to walk in the rain sometimes to get to the lift lobby until now when I need to sell this unit!!!

I had one buyer backing out already because he was irritated that the carpark “rule” was so unfair. And the cars parked there are not even like expensive. Shouldn’t it be on a first come first serve for the day basis???

I pay the same amount of maintenance as the other 6 units. Isn’t it MCST’s duty to take a neutral stand on common property allocation?

It’s really ridiculous to a point that they put up mini carpark barriers to some of their lots. Sometimes I feel like taking a hammer to dismantle them since it’s my common property too!!!!!

What can I do if MCST isn’t able to resolve this for me? Is there a way to seek justice on this matter?

Netizens’ comments

1. You could shame them on social media, usually action is only taken after there is some sort of public controversy and attention. But it will affect the value of your own property. So tread carefully I guess.
2. Check your mcst by laws. I doubt that what they are doing is legal according to the bylaws. Carpark is common property, and no one can claim common property.
   If you want to push this, get a lawyer and be prepared to bring the matter to court. Provided the by laws are in your favour you can probbaly win this.
3. Being in a MCST is more like protecting self interest and for some to push their agenda, being neutral is harder to come by. You can focus on both area, to pester and ask MCST members for a more fair first come first serve or to build up sheltered parking for 2 more lots, while continue looking for more buyers. Not all buyers are bothered by non sheltered parking.
4. They have no legal claim to the covered lots. The lots belong to all residents, especially since you pay the same maintenance fee. Nobody has the right to clamp your wheels if you use the lots when they’re empty. If they’re already parked there, well even if it’s FCFS, they were there first so nothing you can do.

My BF give my credit card for his wife use

How stupid I am for applying a few credit cards for my BF because I knew his financial status was tight. Having credit card convenience was useful for him, and he was responsible and paid off the card each month. However, suddenly, I discovered he had a rather ingenious idea of passing my credit card to his wife to use without my permission or acknowledgement.

He told me his cash flow was tight every month, but from bank statement, each card spent $3000 to $4000 monthly. The final straw was when I noticed transactions for lingerie, hair salon, pedicure spa, etc., even overseas transactions, on my bank statements. Some transactions occurred on the same date and time but in different locations and with different cards.

When I confronted him, he and his wife arrogantly returned all my credit cards. I only questioned him why he didn’t ask for my permission before passing my card to his wife. He started getting angry and started scolding vulgar words like “CCB NB lah.”

My questions are:

1. How did he pass my credit card to his wife to use?

2. As a 50-year-old property agent, shouldn’t his wife know that using an unauthorized credit card is a crime?”

Here are what netizens think:

• Shouldn’t you know it’s not right to use another woman’s husband too

• U should give me. I’ll never let my wife use

• Why u together with other people husband? You Sia already ah?

•  Credit card owner is the “she”? Pardon me… Only when the setting is as such then it sounds logical and more digestible.

• Wow! This whole story sounds damn complicating. You need more BF to understand this whole logic behind this whole story.

• Wait what! You have a affair with someone husband and kpkb about it. You deserve it