I have been dating my BF for about a year. I also have 2 kids from a previous relationship (7 & 5). I took things really slow with my BF in terms of introducing him to my kids.
They just met for the first time 3 months ago. I’ve been slowly having them spend more time together and so far it has been pretty good. My ex is supposed to take the kids every other weekend, but he’s pretty flaky and it doesn’t always work out that way.
My BF has been telling me for the past month or so that he wants to take me out for a fancy date since that isn’t something we have done together yet. This past weekend was supposed to be my ex’s to have the kids, so I told my BF that he can plan something then.
So he did. He booked us a table at one of the nicest restaurants in town (he had to book 3 weeks in advance for a Saturday night reservation). He also got us VIP passes for a movie I’ve been wanting to see. I was so excited when he told me about all of this. I’ve never had someone take me out for a fancy date like that.
But, as usual, my ex ruined it. He flaked out on taking the kids last minute. My ex and I had a big fight about it, but nothing changed. I scrambled to try and find a babysitter, but I couldn’t on short notice. My kids were also really upset that their dad messed up again and the idea of leaving them with a babysitter didn’t sit right with me anyway.
I told my BF what happened and he was initially very sympathetic and supportive, but when I asked him if he would be ok with us just staying in and having a movie night with my kids, his tone changed.
He said that we’ve done movie nights every weekend since he’s met my kids and that he was really looking forward to a change. He said he spent a lot of time making these arrangements and has already spent money on the tickets, which weren’t cheap. I told him he could try to sell them quick, but he didn’t want to try that.
He didn’t really give me an answer on whether or not he would come over to see us and he said “I’ll see what I can do.” Well, turns out what he decided to do was to go to the restaurant and show by himself. He wouldn’t answer my texts or calls all day, he was in town all night.
I confronted him about it the next day and he fessed up. I told him how disappointed and upset I was and he told me to blame my ex, not him. I told him he was just like every other man and would just take the easy way out when things got hard. He told me he tried very hard to make a special night for us and he wasn’t just going to let expensive tickets go to waste.
I called him a jerk, but he thinks I should have worked harder to get a sitter since I knew how much this night meant to him. It meant a lot to me too, but my kids will always come first and they needed me.