Wife (37F) cheated on me (40M). Kids. New house. I’m crushed.
Me (40m) got cheated on by wife (38 f) and I’m beside myself. We’ve got young kids. We just bought a house 8 months ago.
Found out she’s slept with a coworker many times over the past few months. This was a same coworker we were in therapy over about a year ago because she lied about meeting up with him a few times but swore nothing happened. We had moved on from it.
Then out of the blue I saw the last month or so worth of texts between them that showed up on an old iPad of hers my son dug out from the closet. It’s deep, there’s “love you babe”, meet ups. Meets ups in our house while I was working night shift. It’s worst-case scenario.
I don’t know what I’m looking for. Prob just needed to vent. I feel broken. Broken about not seeing my kids every day. Broken about the grand plans we had for our family. And that I’ll be turning 40 next month and have my world broken up.
Netizens’ comments
- You get a lawyer, don’t leave the house for the sake of the kids, and keep it as peaceful as you can until the divorce is finalized.
Understand that this person is no longer on your side, they don’t have your best interest in mind, so act accordingly.. do not show sympathy and give her more in the divorce than she can get without your help. I’m sorry this happened.
Now’s the time to reach out to family and good guy friends who will be there and help you through this time. You’ll feel tempted over the next couple months to look for intimacy in other places, do not do this as it is not going to be in your best interest. Take time to heal and build the life you want without her in it.
Do not share with her your plans of divorce or what you want post divorce. It’s going to be a hard transition, but remember this person is not on your team and only wants what’s best for her. Again sorry this happened. - I’m sorry this happened to you. It’s disgusting. You don’t deserve to be lied to and cheated on. No one does.
I know that feeling of how can I ever trust my own decisions about a relationship.
I wouldn’t even confront her yet. Contact a lawyer at this point. Take the proof you have with you to the lawyer and use it to set yourself up to an advantage for custody. Then ask her to leave the house. Cheater needs to leave. She can’t be trusted again.