When your partner tells you they love you, ask yourself if it’s because they love you for who you are as an individual or because of what they can get you to do for them.
It’s easy to be “loved” by someone:
1. if they always get their way with you around
2. if you sacrifice your individuality and ditch all your own interests/hobbies and take on your partner’s ones instead.
3. if your partner doesn’t care about your interests but can make you sit through theirs.
4. when your partner knows they can give you the bare minimum without you realising that you deserve better.
If your partner tells you they love you, ask yourself if you’ve changed everything you’ve been doing/enjoying prior to meeting him/her. Then ask yourself if your partner has even expressed any interest in your passions, much less changed any of their interests to align with yours? If the first answer is yes and the second answer is no, there’s a big chance they “love you” because you’ve become another them rather than because of who you are.
Talk is cheap and just because someone is good at being a boyfriend/girlfriend, doesn’t mean they will be a good life-long partner.
And someone saying “I love you” to convince you they love you, doesn’t necessarily reflect the truth.
Don’t let someone’s “I love you” stop you from realising that it might just be used as a tool to keep you there for their benefit rather than a sincere declaration.
Here are what netizens think:
- When did this place suddenly become filled with love guru advise for the criminally insane?
- we all have choices, your partner can’t force you if you refuse to do anything you don’t want to do. you did it to please your partner, it is your choice so don’t cry father cry mother.
- I think most people with sufficient common sense combined with the ability to read social cues and body language will know whether the person is sincere towards them. Some may choose to ignore the actions and believe the words because they are emotionally invested or didn’t want to accept the truth. Humans aren’t perfect. There’s no such thing as the perfect love or the perfect relationship. We forgive, we compromise. We give and we also take. That’s how some relationships last. I find people who tend to put themselves first in a relationship aren’t always happy. If you’re lucky to meet a compatible one, you will be happy to give and it sounds like you haven’t met a compatible person yet.
- If love is so complicated, it’s probably not love.