Growing up, my dad was a man of few words. He was the kind of father who would rather show his love through actions than express it verbally.
He was the type of dad that would rather show me how to fix a car engine than to try to explain it.
This especially applied to the topics of relationships and human intimacy.
Gave me ‘rubber’ the first time I went out to party with my mates
I remembered when I was 18 and first went out to ‘chiong’ with my school mates, my dad gave me a ‘rubber’ instead of telling me not to engage in casual intimacies.
He knew that it was bound to happen sooner or later, and he thought that teaching me about safe practices would be better for me.
He was just different from the traditional type of parents who would avoid such topics or just warn their children not to fool around.
I appreciated what he did for me
During the days where I constantly went out to ‘chiong’ with my mates, I realized the full extent of my dad’s gift and his lessons.
I had classmates who had contracted STIs, and I’m sure some of them had contracted them from having intimacies with strangers without any ‘rubber’.
My dad’s gift wasn’t just about giving me a ‘rubber’; it was about teaching me the importance of being safe and responsible when it comes to having intimacies with others.
He obviously knew that we are young and no matter how parents like him warn us not to engage in casual intimacies, we would end up doing it.
He chose the unconventional way, but it worked out well
So instead of trying to warn us not to do so, he took the unconventional way to teach me to be aware of potential risks associated with having unprotected intimacies, and to always use protection when engaging in intimate activities.
To this day, I am grateful to my dad for giving me that ‘rubber’.
I know now that he was trying to protect me from potential risks associated with having unprotected intimacies, and I am thankful that he thought enough of me to take the time to teach me about safe practices.
He may not have said it in so many words, but I know that he was trying to show me how much he cares.