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Wednesday, September 28, 2022
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DAD SOLD HDB TO MOVE TO JB IN ORDER TO MEET CPF PAYOUT, ABANDONS WIFE & KIDS

Back story was about 15 years ago. Minimum CPF payout was increased. Only way to get money from CPF is to sell the house. And stay in JB. Selfish dad chose to sell flat and retire himself even when his kids are still studying in Poly and me in uni.

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Mum refused to get divorced as she still believed in him.

Mum worked full time to feed herself and the ‘sick’ husband who still can afford to gamble and smoke cigarettes. As for me, I didn’t bother about them when he made decisions only for himself and mum didn’t stop him for our family. That $40k or so was gone in less than 5 years.

10 years on, mum finally got divorced and still chose to remarry to someone else. His children refused to support him and he still believed that we must pay him $1k each for him to earn his ‘salary’. Obviously, us kids refused. He didn’t spend a single cent on us. Mostly, relatives, the govt and mum paid for our life expenses. Didn’t really need much money as we lived on a bare minimum just for food and transport. His money is is his to gamble, and for his overseas trips by himself. If only they had divorced earlier, it would have been easier to get a rental flat or buy a smaller flat in SG.

Grew up being treated badly. Every single mistake was punished by a wide range of equipment, leather belt, hangar, metal mop, plastic pole. Even called up the police few times, but police did nothing. They only care about closing the case and warn us to control our noise level and to be good kids. But at least the beating stopped for the day.

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Getting into NTU was like a ticket out of a sickening life. But thinking back, I’m just happy being married and enjoying my own life now.

15 years later, I’m glad to see that NTU hostels are aplenty compared to back then. Supports are much better now. And police take a serious case on child abuse. Nevertheless, dysfunctional parents still exists. And if you’re an undergraduate facing the same problems I had, press on. I didn’t have the tenacity to push through.

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