Let me tell you all about the absolute state of the Singapore dating market right now.
So, I matched with this girl on Tinder a few days ago. Her profile looked perfectly normal, standard CBD Office Lady aesthetic—cafe hopping photos, one mandatory photo at the National Gallery, and the usual “looking for someone to try new food with” bio. We matched, started chatting, and the vibe was actually quite okay. We talked about work, crazy BTO wait times, and our favorite hawker food. I thought to myself, not bad, maybe can bring her out to that new pasta place at Bugis this weekend.
Then, out of absolutely nowhere, the conversation takes a sharp left turn. She suddenly drops the ultimate Singaporean HR interview question:
“Btw, do you drive? Got car or not?”
I wanted to be completely honest, so I told her, “No lah, I just take MRT or bus. Sometimes Grab if it’s raining or late.” We live in Singapore, for goodness sake! Our public transport is world-class, and everywhere is connected.
Guess what this absolute princess replied?
“Oh… sorry but I don’t date guys without cars. I really hate taking the MRT, always so squeezy and sweaty. No car, no date.”
Excuse me? Knn, you think COE is CDC voucher that I can just go to the Community Club and claim is it?! COE for a basic Category A car is already hitting 100k plus! You expect me to drop $200,000 on a Honda Jazz just so I have the absolute privilege of acting as your unpaid private hire driver to ferry you from Punggol to Orchard Road? All for a $45 avocado toast brunch that I probably have to foot the bill for anyway?
I was so stunned by the sheer entitlement that my intrusive thoughts totally took over. If we are doing a transactional checklist, then two can play this game.
I calmly typed back:
“Oh, ok. Just curious, do you have a 39F cup size?”
She replied almost instantly:
“WTF? Excuse me? Are you sick? Fking pervert.”
So I hit her with the ultimate combo:
“You want a personal chauffeur, go download Gojek or TADA. You demand premium hardware and financial assets from me before even meeting up, I demand premium hardware from you. No 39F nei nei, no free meal.”
Instant unmatch and block.
Honestly, what is wrong with some people here? You are out here earning a completely average salary but expecting a guy to own a condo, a Mercedes, and have the patience of a saint. If I had a car, I’d be driving myself to JB for cheap seafood, not driving around a logistics manager with severe princess sickness.
Anyway, rant over. I’m going down to buy my $4.50 Cai Fan (two meat, one veg, no fish because inflation). No car, but at least my conscience and my bank account are clear. Peace out.