I admit that I’m still grieving and may not be thinking clearly.
So my Dad was a great Dad to me but not to my sister. He cheated on her Mum with mine and got pregnant with me maybe a year later.
We moved away and he didn’t have much contact with her after that. Our Dad hadn’t seen her in about a decade when he passed.
So when he did pass away, his house (which my Mum co-owned) and it’s contents went to me and the money (savings and insurance) was split 50/50 between the two of us. The first payment was received earlier this month.
I have absolutely zero issue with this arrangement but she didn’t even attend the funeral. She didn’t offer to help with the admin stuff. I did all of it on my own. On the day of the funeral she tagged herself and a bunch of friends at a restaurant.
I get that my Dad let her down. He routinely bailed on plans, forgot birthdays etc but it just doesn’t sit right with me that she took his money but didn’t even show up to the funeral.
I met her for lunch on Boxing Day and told her my feelings. That I thought it was disrespectful for her to take the cash but not offer to help me with any of the arrangements or even show up to the funeral.
I wasn’t angry and I didn’t raise my voice. She did cry and left rather abruptly. That night she sent me a bunch of messages calling me unbelievably rude and that I’m an a-hole for making her feel bad for being mad at her for taking what she is owed. I really didn’t think I was being rude but perhaps I’m too close to the situation.