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Thursday, February 9, 2023
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DAUGHTER FROM BROKEN MARRIAGE SAYS IT’S HARD TO GET LOVE FROM HER MOTHER

would it kill a mum to have her daughter torn from her life

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To all mothers out there would it hurt you to have your daughter torn from your life?

My parents got divorce when i was 18 year old, They were fighting a lot on who should get the custody of both my sister and I. I didnt get to choose but i ended up living with my dad.

If given the choice back then, i would rather live alone instead of having to choose between my mum and dad and im not close to both of them too.

I rarely visited over the past 5 years and I do feel empty. But whenever I meet my mum, she would start to nitpick about my physical appearance and nag at me in public.

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Basically, it can be very suffocating being with her at times even though she will be the one to help me financially. So sometime i just avoid her. Maybe it is just her way of showing love? But now that I am working what I need is not the fiancial help. But even though i am an adult I still crave for intention time to spend with her. Is that okay for an adult

On the rare ocassion when I am out with her for a meal she would give me money to buy food while she go shop elsewhere before meeting back again.

Honestly, I cant even remember when was the last time we had a proper meal together.

Recently i was taking a grab and after the grab driver found out that I am not staying with my mum he told me to spend more time with her and that it would be hard on her to have her daughter “torn’ from her.

Honestly all these years i never really consider from the perspective of my parents or their feelings and that incident make me take a step back to evaluate.

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Im not sure how to proceed from here cause she still nitpick. I used to tried to tell her that I want to eat with her but she will just brush it aside and go walk walk then come back living me to eat alone.

Though i get a free meal, want i need more is the emotional bonding. Is it okay for me as an adult to feel this emotionally starved?

Here are what netizens think:

  • The grab driver don’t know your situation. If she feels heartbroken to have you torn from her she would try to spend more time with you instead of give you money and meet you later right? I feel no need to chase someone who’s lukewarm towards you and you know your situation best
  • We are made to be loved and to love. I am not sure how it will work out btw you and your parents, but perhaps I may suggest that you be the bigger person and love both your mom and dad back. But before this, love yourself and find healing and closure to the childhood scars. All the best.
  • Even at 36,I still crave attention from my mother but like your mother she doesn’t care. I have my own family(husband and children) and she tried to sow discord between my family and I.
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