I’ve had a tumultuous relationship with my mom since my dad died 8 years ago. Mainly due to her being a practising Religious Scientist (she prays instead of using modern medicine.)
So yeah she’s always been crazy but my dad kept her relatively stable.
She now has this fiancé I can’t stand. He’s crass, he’s always vying for attention yet isn’t funny at all, and he smokes cigs. Just don’t care for him.
I haven’t seen my mom since August ’21 when I lived in Johor with my boyfriend which was a 3-hour drive but she only visited me a few times in the 8 years I lived there.
She’s been retired since June ’22 and kept saying she wanted to visit me but was too busy to do so. Living that retired life you know. It was all BS but I was secretly relieved because I don’t want her to stay in my house because I don’t think we have anything in common.
I eventually quit my job and moved in July ’22 to live down by my BF’s family an 5-hour drive (KL) from my mom. We bought a huge house but it’s a fixer-upper and we are still working on it. Since my BF came into the picture I do go on all holidays with his family, to be honest, it’s just more fun with them.
Anyway, I wake up and my mom texted me at 5 am asking to reserve a weekend to come to see me in October and says she’ll be driving and her fiancé will be coming but he promises to be good.
I’m not for that. First I hate an early morning text when I have to work. Next I don’t want her in my house because everything I do like having a drink she’ll disapprove of. But I really don’t want her fiancé in my house. I am scared of how much they’ll embarrass me in front of my BF. So I just said I’m sorry that doesn’t work for me.
I feel guilty that when she dies I will regret not seeing her more but she’s never been much of a mom to me anyway. Any interaction with her involves her praying to me and it’s exhausting.