This is going to be a bit on the long side, so I apologize ahead of time. Im 42, my mother is 64 has always been manipulative, and mentally abusive toward me. This unfortunately extended to my daughter/
About 12 years ago, she yet again found herself fairly much homeless (after she got cheated by some guy). My husband and I took her in and had her stay with us. My daughter (known as A) was 3 or 4 at the time. The ground rules for her were, this is our house and we will raise our daughter as we see fit.
My husband and I are atheists. My mother is a Christian. We told her we’d support her in going to the church of her choosing and even help her find one where she felt at home. However, we told her that she could not take our daughter to church or teach her that Christianity was the only way. We wanted to introduce our daughter to religion as this is what some people believe and this is what her dad and I believe. We wanted her to make up her own mind about this.
The rules were followed fairly well for the most part for a little bit. Until we went to get our taxes done one afternoon. We came back to a very upset kid. I took her for a drive to Mcdonald’s and asked what happened. A said that my mother had told her that we were going to go to hell because we don’t believe in god and that if she didn’t pray now that God would let her go to hell too. She then proceeded to teach my daughter to pray.
This is where I drew the line. I could take my mother trying to manipulate me all the live long day. I could take her abuse and it didn’t matter because she’s my mother and that’s just what I did for my whole life. When she did this to an impressionable child, my baby, that is where I drew the line.
I promptly kicked her out of my house and told her I would never talk to her again.
Just recently, I heard through my brother (who I have also not spoken to because he took her side and said I was the unfillial) messaged me through Facebook and said she wasn’t doing well and was expected to not make it for much longer. She apparently has congestive heart failure or something. Then last night I got a message from her on Facebook.
This is her redacted message:
I still truly love & miss you and A! Please, please, please allow me in your lives again? I realize how much I must have hurt you, can you find it in your heart to forgive me before I die? My new phone number is XXX-XXX-XXXX. Will you be as kind to call me?? I truly want you guys in my life!!!
I want to ignore but my brother and mothers side of the family is telling me I am an A-hole.
What should I do?