Hi! I want to share a situation with you to receive different points of view.
I’m (M23) in a very good relationship for two years with a really nice woman (F22). We live in different cities, but they’re pretty close, so we only see each other on weekends.
Recently, she was called for a new job. It will be a great opportunity and I supported her decision to make that change. There’s only one issue: in this new job, she will be working with a guy that has some feelings for her. When we started to date, he even blocked her and said that she was hurting him… kind of childish. And they never had anything. It’s only his interest, she never responded.
Nowadays, he says he’s over it. As they live really close and will be working together, this guy said to her that he can give her a ride to work everday. What do you think about the situation? The workplace is far from where they live, so it would be very good to her to get a ride as she doesn’t have a car. But at the same time, I think it’s a bit of an annoying situation knowing that the guy will be with her in the car everyday as he has (or at least had) some feelings for her.
What do you think? Does it make sense for me to be bothered by this? Should I talk to her?
Here are what netizens think:
- That’s a good way for him to un ‘get over it’ proximity is the worst thing for feelings good and bad.
- Why would that even matter if she isn’t interested in him? I’m not sure if it’s a cultural thing, but most of these responses seem really controlling to me.
- Honestly, as a woman in THIS day and age, I wouldn’t even feel comfortable accepting the ride given the history. I’d politely decline. His feelings are bound to reignite despite him being “over it” if he even is in actuality (highly doubt that by the way).
- I wouldn’t feel safe if I was in her position, so I would have told the guy absolutely not. I’m not sure why she would want to take a ride from him, even for convenience. Talk to her about it because I’m going to give the benefit of the doubt, and say she hasn’t thought through the potential scenarios of what could happen if she’s left alone in a car with this guy.