A netizen shared how he was made used of by his so-called “gf” who sounds obviously more like a gold digger or a “honey bee” going from flower to flower.
Here is the story:
My ex-GF and I have been together for a year. Met online on a dating portal. I felt that everything was great about the relationship – I loved her and she loved me. We never quarrelled even once. I pay for food and experiences 95% of the time (except for times she insisted really hard), I drive her home after dates at my place, I order grab food to her house for everyone in her family and I even offered to help her with her work when I saw that she was really stressed out. That’s not to say we didn’t have disagreements.
She would say that she disagreed with some of the things that I’ve done and some of the choices that I made. Although she disagreed, she did mention that she can see how I’ve arrived at those decisions. She cited a few incidents:
1) While we were out walking, we saw a man lying on his side on the ground. Beside him stood 3 to 4 people, most likely his friends and family. My ex wanted to go over and give that person CPR but I thought it was too risky (cos it was COVID season right now) and the guy already looked like he has the necessary help (rolled to his side and the people around him called an ambulance already). She disagreed with my choice of action to not help.
2) While crossing the road outside a petrol kiosk, a car nearly drove into my knee because the driver was on his phone. I thumped the car hood (natural reflex) and jumped away. Didn’t leave a dent in the car. Ex thought I was being aggressive. I don’t want to generalise, but wouldn’t the emotions of someone who loves you worry instead of judging you?
3) At the cafe ordering food, the cashier skipped my ex and me in the queue to serve someone behind us. When it finally came to our turn, I asked the cashier why did she skip us? The cashier gave us a generic answer and I told her that she wasn’t being fair to us. I let it go at that. My ex thought that I was being too confrontational when I was just letting the cashier know that people who are queuing do not appreciate being glossed over.
Recently, she went out with her male colleague for Friday dinner 1 on 1 at a posh cafe. When she mentioned this to me, I did highlight my disapproval but I did not want to make her decisions for her. I questioned whether this dinner was necessary. She replied that it was with a colleague. On the way to the dinner, she texted me that she was wearing a new dress to the dinner and she thought it looked cute. I asked for a photo and she gave me a photo taken in the reflection of the MRT glass window after a few hours and late into the night. I couldn’t even see anything clearly in that photo. Fast forward 1 week, she decided to break up with me and stated that I was not what she wanted. She wanted a ready-made man and I was not it. She confessed that there were 30-year-olds who had an interest in dating her (including that colleague she met for dinner).
Questions and comments: 1) What does a ready-made man mean? I’m in the financial industry with pretty good career options going ahead. I am a responsible and loyal guy who just wants to provide the best for my family. To that end, I am starting some side hustles for extra income too. I am earning lesser than my ex currently but this was because of NS and I spent more time studying (I have an overseas masters degree that was self-funded).
2) She said she loved me but she would have to break up with me. I disagree with this. I think she merely liked me for my utility and not as a person. Life need not be a Korean heartwrenching drama.
3) I felt really disgusted that the reason she told me for breaking up was all the disagreements that were brought up multiple times. This is clearly a big deal for her whereas I thought these were immaterial to the relationship because I’ve explained the context and thought she understood it.
It felt like the whole relationship was a pretence and her love for me was fake. Oh well, sometimes in life you win some, sometimes you lose some. I got my closure and I deserve someone better. I just hope that she wouldn’t live to regret this. She might prefer a ready-made man, but what could she offer a ready-made man that will make him keep her? Obviously not emotional connection because she doesn’t value that in our relationship.My two cents. Rant over.