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Thursday, February 29, 2024


Boyfriend wants to be a grab driver and do odd jobs – should I leave?


My boyfriend and I, both 26 years old have been together for 3 years. We are both currently working in an MNC and SME respectively, taking home a decent amount of 3k per month. We just signed contract for our BTO that will be coming in 4 years’ time.

Recently, he has been bringing up that he wants to quit his current job to be a grab driver and doing odd jobs, because he feels really tired with working in his current company. He has been bringing this up and discussing with me for the past 5 months. Upon hearing this, I actually feel scared for my future with him, because the fact that him doing odd jobs might not bring in a stable income like he is currently bringing in.

He did say he plan to take on many shifts a day to aim to hit 4k a month, but I feel skeptical about that, because he is the kind who actually just lazed around at home, playing games and watching netflix during the period he was working from home. I am unsure if he will really make full use of the time to earn money from odd jobs, given that now he has freedom of how he wants to plan his time. I am worried that I would be the sole breadwinner for the family in the future.

I do have my own dreams and goals to achieve. I want to start my own business but if I were to be the sole breadwinner, a lot of my money would go to the house and I would not have enough capital. Also, knowing that my boyfriend only has a month’s worth of salary in his savings account and the rest in stocks makes me feel even more rocky.


He did discuss his plan openly with me and although I feel skeptical about it, I don’t want to restrict him in his future planning as well. What should I do? I did start to have thoughts of leaving this relationship because of this potentially rocky future ahead. Any kind soul out there who encountered this or can give some advice? Greatly appreciated.

Here are what netizens think:

  • I’ve seen before grab drivers that after deducting overheads, take home 6k easily with 1 day off per week. I have also seen before driver take home 1.5k after deducting all the overheads. Same for delivery riders, I have seen people taking home 8k/9k, have also seen people saying “not for human do one cannot earn anything”. Discipline, commitment and motivation is very important. If no discipline to wake up early and go out, want to sleep till 1-2pm, wake up then eat lunch and start at 3, then obviously cannot earn anything. Then best to just stick to office job whereby they state your working hours and take fixed salary.
  • You sound like a woman who wants her husband to be on the same level as you in terms of life goals and career aspirations. Nothing wrong with that. But maybe he is not a good match for you and I think in your own heart you know that already. My advice is don’t get married yet. Give him a chance to follow his dream just to see if it will work. Who knows, maybe it will. If it doesn’t and you still have concerns then it’s time to reevaluate on whether to continue a future together. Maybe he tries it out for 6 months and realises it’s a pipe dream and will go back to what he was doing so give him that opportunity to try at least to satisfy himself. After all you also intend to start a business and you will appreciate his support when the time comes.
  • Being on the same page matters for some key life values – finances and having kids are two of the most important ones.Leave.You both will fight like cats and dogs throughout your marriage if you don’t see eye to eye on this.
  • We don’t want a case where upon keys collection, cpf not enough, hdb loan approved lesser amount, need reassessment due self employed.. then must fork out cash etc.After get yr flat… he wants do to grab then go ahead own time own target.But when u say he lazed around often.are you sure he’s going to be that committed
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