My(43m) GF(36f) asked to open the relationship, and i just pointed her to the door.
So, like the title says, My(43m) GF(36f) asked that we open the relationship, and i just pointed her to the door. it was too much?I strongly believe that in a monogamous relationship when someone ask to open it, well is because that person saw something else out there and is ready to try it instead of working in the relationship. Basically is blindsiding his/her partner.
So i have being with Fran (36) over the last two years and a half, almost two as a couple. I thought that things were moving smoothly and was about to ask her to move in (At the begining of April), But lately she was acting rather distant.
So i decided to wait a little and watch. (i was cheated on the past, so i’m a little cautious with some signs)
Out of nowhere this last friday she asked me to open the relationship, she gave me all her big speech, and when she ended her “presentation” i asked her if she has someone in mind, because is not like we decided to day and basically going out with other persons tomorrow
basically i trick her into telling me what i already knew, and yes she has someone in mind, which means to me, that either she already did it or she has all set up.
So i got up, walk around the apartment while she was trying to sell that this could be good for both us and our relationship, by the time she ended talking i hand her one of my sportbags with all her stuff in it, and tell her to left the spare key over the table on her way out, that we are done and she knows why.
Then i went and turn on the TV, just trying to look indifferent and save face, she was speechless for a while, about to cry, but before she couldn’t say something, i tell her that i didn’t wanna talk about anything and she should leave.
As soon as she left, i felt like crap, so unworthy, cried a little and as right now i’m still mourning.
My phone has gone almost nuclear with all the calls and text i received from friends of both sides about my extreme reaction over her “simple” request. Don’t know what she told them.
So now i’m sitting wondering if i really went overboard and at the same time fighting the urge to run back to her, because deep inside even knowing my feelings for her are still there, the trust is gone and i’m not gonna spend all my time watching her movements, is not healthy, may be in time, really don´t know.
Before anyone pointed out, yes i know, my reaction is pure reflection of me, not what she did or was about to do, or could do.
so, did i went overboard?