Is it a sampling issue or are people from not-so-wealthy families more spendthrift, tend to engage in a lot more hedonistic activities, and are much more arrogant than people from generationally wealthy families?
I have dated a total of 4 guys.
One was from a ultra-high net worth family. He was my first. I dated him the longest. His parents own one of the most famous food product companies in Southeast Asia. I met him at a friend’s wedding. He had just come back from the US, graduated from Penn, in-line to take over the business as the oldest child. Due to differences in goals (he doesn’t want kids period), we felt it was better if we parted ways. Apart from the kid issue, I would have married him.
He was an intense individual, very ambitious, very energetic, very calculating, very forward-looking, very pragmatic. He was also modest and thrifty. He loves eating at hawker centres (no air-con), he always wears his old PE shorts from high school, carries an old iPhone with a cracked screen, borrows suits to wear to weddings, buys cakes from Four Leaves to celebrate his parents’ birthdays, never travels for leisure (only for work), takes the bus and MRT whenever he can etc. The only luxury he’d splurge on is air travel (he only flies SQ but economy). At 30 he already received all of his dad’s holdings because they wanted to avoid the inheritance process to save on inconvenience. His parents are the same as he is—believed strongly in a world-class education, for which they were willing to spend an arm and a leg. Otherwise, their whole family pretty much lived by a similar philosophy.
The other three were pretty similar. Middle-class white-collar families. They themselves had white-collar office jobs—two were lawyers and one was a Morgan Stanley banker. They were partygoers. Traveled frequently for leisure. Ate at expensive restaurants. Went to concerts, even paying $1200 on one occasion for two tickets. Bought the latest phones, laptops, gadgets. The banker bought a BMW 3 series 2 years into his job. He also drank expensive spirits and wine. Once, one of them found out that I dated someone from a crazy rich family and he claimed that he was self-made and didn’t have to live off daddy’s money. All of whom were very eager to present themselves as upper-class, which was completely contrary to what I personally experienced being close to a centimillionaire family. I broke up with all three of them for similar reasons, I didn’t enjoy what they did for fun and they kept putting pressure on me to do what they did. The common reason was “[I] will not be young forever.” I concur, but I much prefer to focus on my work as I am saving up to buy rental properties to retire.
I have taken a break from dating because it is really frustrating that young people who refuse to participate in “enjoying life” are somehow treated like there’s something wrong with us, when I am almost sure that it wasn’t the case one or two generations ago. I’m still trying to make rent, I don’t feel like I have enough money in my savings account for if I get laid off, I have student loans etc. I make good money (high 4-figure monthly) as an auditor. I don’t think I’m comfortable enough financially to start traveling. But people expect me to. It makes me wonder if society in general think a certain lifestyle is how the ultra-rich tend to live without actually knowing how most of them actually live. Or is it the truth that the wealthy does spend their time in high-living and I just met a guy who was from an unconventional rich family?
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