I’ve been using my parents’ money to pay for my boyfriend’s expenses without him knowing
I (19F) have been with my boyfriend (19M) for four years. I come from an extremely wealthy nuclear family, and he is the child of a single, now-retired parent with very little money.
My parents are the most altruistic, generous people I know; my whole life they modeled and taught humility and financial responsibility to my siblings and me. They love my boyfriend dearly, and see the incredible potential that he has to exceed iN his future career.
My boyfriend worked several jobs at a time, but due to the rigorous nature of his studies he doesn’t have the bandwidth to work during the year.
Recently, he’s been going hungry sometimes because he’s a commuter without a meal plan and can’t pay for his food. He also doesn’t have the money to replace worn out clothes, so I give him new clothes as gifts or sew up the holes for him.
I realize that this is a common living situation for many people, but due to my circumstances, this is the first time I’m really seeing how hard it really is and I want to help.
I work during the holidays, but since my parents emphasize the importance of education, they give me a sizable monthly allowance that eliminates the need for me to get a job at school. I am grateful for this “safety net”, but I often feel as though my bf needs it more. He will not accept handouts from anyone, so I use some of my money to pay for things like haircuts.
Circling back to the food situation, I was venting to my parents about how worried I was about him, wanting only a listening ear. However, they are offering to give him a decent amount of money to cover living expenses until he can work during the holidays.
He doesn’t know that I’ve done this, and I’m worried that he will not accept it.