A girl shared how she was feeding a poor guy that thinks that he is a cool band boy but as it turns out he was a loser who leeches on his girlfriend, after using her. He threw her away
Here is the story:
Last year I was still actively trying to meet new people. Got into a whirlwind relationship with a guy who apparently fell for me really quickly (a bit of a red flag which I had addressed to him several times, warning him not to just talk about how he was going to be the best partner and make all these promises and get my hopes up). He also talked about marriage a lot. Eventually, I went along with it and I was happy because I thought I’d found a life partner, which is my goal. So, I put all my effort into the relationship.
He freelanced and was in a band, and I loaned him money or bought stuff for him, paid for a LOT of things. Met his bandmates, tried my best to be the best supportive GF and even paid for their drinks at his bandmate’s birthday event.
Weeks passed, he f**ked up some band stuff because apparently ‘he was too distracted by a relationship’ and his bandmates apparently all agreed that the relationship was f**king with him (and I’m still super sour about how they approached him about it). And by the way, I wasn’t even meeting him much around that time because I knew what he was working on was big.
Note: To be clear, I never demanded his time (again, trying to be the best supportive GF I could be). I would work around HIS schedule and/or location for meetups. If he could only meet for an hour, I would never throw a fit or get mad, and I was super understanding.
So, based on what all his bandmates said, he came over to my block one night and just told me he needs to focus on his career because other things were also going to come up and he was going to get busier. I was obviously crushed because like I said, my initial fears of him talking about long term plans so early on all came true. I was mad that he hadn’t considered his career and work before making all those promises, and even madder at myself for having spent so much money on him. I tried to defend myself and reminded him how I never expected much from him, and how I’ve been nothing but supportive in all his endeavours and even with his friends.
Started Drinking and sleeping around
That relationship really f**ked me up. I started drinking a lot after that, and honestly, I’m still struggling with sobriety now. The drinking also made me make some really bad decisions and got me in bad situations. A few months ago I was out with a friend drinking and a friend went home first because she’d already puked. Her BF came to pick her up and I assured her I was going to finish my drink and head home after. At this point, the place was already spinning for me. After she left I took out my phone to reply to texts and I responded to someone who I was talking to on OKC. I made the huge mistake of telling him I was alone and drunk. He arrived where I was in fifteen minutes and immediately whisked me back to his apartment (this was the first time we met) where I was basically ‘held’ the whole night and I couldn’t leave until I got him off twice and he fell asleep. He didn’t stop even though I was crying and I just wanted to go home.
So, that incident just f**ked with me even more, and again I turned to more booze, only this time coupled with severe social isolation (this is even before the virus). I meet friends maybe once a month but honestly, if it were up to me I would just never go out again. I have tried talking to new people but I’m just so f**ked up now I know it’s not fair to even think about a relationship before I fix myself.
tl;dr – Last relationship triggered me to start drinking heavily (yes I am aware it was a choice that I made), which led to a bad situation, which led to more drinking and isolating myself. Gotta work on myself before thinking about relationships.