Is ‘the chase’ really necessary or overrated?
Coming from a girl POV, I personally dont like to be ‘chased’. What i mean is that the guy making the extra effort to take me out to expensive dates, or do unpractical stuff that is out of his way just to make me happy.
And all of this effort usually die down after becoming official in relationship. So ‘the chase’ kinda make me feel that it is a ‘fake it till you make it’ strategy and most of the time it got nothing to do with or not beneficial to the practicalities of a long term relationship, like consistent effort, responsibilities etc.
In fact i see it as detrimental to the health of the relationship because its very common to hear things like “wah when he chase me that time he do this that this then now all dont have already.”
So like, whats the point of chasing girls and allowing us to create this unrealistic expectation of guys, thinking that oh they can maintain this effort thruout?
Like please SG cost of living so expensive, every week expensive dinner once its almost not practical for most people.
But the things is, i realise that if i ‘cut the chase’, the guys will feel weird like they dont know what to do next lol!
Like i try to keep the date practical, normally hang out in dressdown clothes, but it somehow these settings kinda kill the romance for most guys?
So idk la… thoughts?
Netizens’ comments
- Yeah personally as a guy, I hate chasing after girls too lol. As a practical guy and someone who likes to “cut to the chase”, you’d probably be a good fit with the right personalities if I was still looking for a partner.
But I think that’s the beauty of us people – not everyone is the same and we’re all unique in our own ways. Some girls like to be chased, some girls don’t; some guys like to chase; some guys don’t. And I think that just makes being a relationship with the right person even more gratifying. - Girl you are a unicorn.
It is normal for people to enjoy the feeling of being chased. Most people (both girls and guys) would not mind that.
But societal norms dictate that guys should do the chasing. And then there’s this whole “happy wife, happy life” mentality after marriage. Such expectations are instilled into people even before they start dating. Hence guys don’t mind doing the chasing and girls expect to be chased.
Maybe I’m also an outlier, but I don’t subscribe to any of these ideas. Because what’s the point of a relationship if I’m the one that’s doing all the giving but I get little to nothing in return?