How do you tell your partner they are becoming less attractive to you and ask for them to work on it?
I’ve (27) been dating my BF (29) for almost 3.5 years. For the first two years I couldn’t imagine my life without him or imagine wanting anyone else and I still feel like he’s an incredible partner.
However, I am significantly less attracted to him now than I used to. Obviously, the stage of infatuation and new relationship energy is bound to wear off but I believe being attracted to my partner (physically and mentally) is important.
He really doesn’t take care of himself. He has a lot of inherited digestion issues including celiac which causes his breath to smell like rotten eggs when his guts aren’t doing well.
It didn’t used to bother me enough to be a problem most of the time but it’s getting really unattractive and I have a hard time making out with him.
He also has been loosing hair. Tbh it’s gotten better than when I first met him because he started taking meds and using good shampoo & hair oil (both things I’ve worked really hard to find for him because he hates most lotions and anything moisturizing).
The thing is he wants LONG (ish) hair and it’s slowly starting to feel like a toupee especially since he isn’t styling it and refuses to accept that his hair is getting curly and fuzzy as it’s thinning.
On top of this he just shaved all of his facial hair and I had never seen his bare face before. I felt like one of those baby’s that cry when their dad shaved off his beard.
He’s so rough with it that his chin is always flaky and inflamed but he refuses to put anything on it (again he hates anything moisturizing).
I really need to talk to him about this but I don’t know how to bring this up without sounding insensitive because some of it he can’t control but some of it he clearly doesn’t care about/ doesn’t want to deal with it.
I’ve obviously mentioned these things throughout the years and I’ve tried to find solutions that he would like but I’ve reached a point where NEED him to care and put in more effort if we are going to have a romantic relationship.