my dad is too much
im a female, 20 next year, and im not allowed to drink alcohol, not allowed to go clubbing, not allowed to stay out past 12am, not allowed to go for supper and do many other things as long as its past 12am. The reason for this is because my dad associates going home past 12am with sex workers and club goers (which in his opinion ALL are bad people). i mean, there is no denying that there is some truth in what he says. BUT i cant even go for something as innocent as supper with my friends. he lectures me regularly to remind me of what i should and should not do. I do appreciate reminders here and there but there is a limit to the amount of times that i want to listen to the same thing again and again.
He thinks everyone who drinks alcohol, is a bad influence and thinks that my friends who drink, peer pressure me to drink, when they dont. in fact, they do not encourage me to do so. i mean, of course i want to try things at least once in my life. so i do try types of alcohol, but clearly, i do not like it so i dont get hooked on to it. He doesn’t allow me to go to my boyfriend’s house often as he says that my boyfriend’s parents will definitely talk bad about me for going over once a week or once every 2 weeks.
Recently, i wore a dress from TEM, which i admit, is quite revealing. BUT i was very happy with it, and was very happy with myself. My boyfriend nvr made an issue out of the clothes i wear and in fact, that dress is his favourite dress out of all my dresses. He always tells me that what i wear does not matter much, as long as i am satisfied and happy. Of course i do get stares here and there, from people from the older generation, but thats nothing new. i always bring an outerwear along so i can cover up more on public transportation and when i feel cold. i always wear the outerwear before i leave the house and when i come back home. i only take it off when its rlly hot outside or when im taking photos which is to mostly show the clothes that i wear and the way i look in them.
My dad recently confronted me, and lectured me, saying that my clothes are getting too revealing and that it was disrespectful to my boyfriend that i wear it to grab other people’s attention. He said that if i wear clothes like that, it is to attract the attention of others and therefore, it disrespects my boyfriend. He also said that he has been wanting to talk to me about this matter for awhile and he had asked my mum to talk to me. But my mum nvr approached me about it. i told him that my boyfriend does not mind that i wear the type of clothes that i wear. but he counters it by saying “that’s what he says in front of you”. so i just said that if he doesnt tell me straight up, that he has a problem with what i wear, i wouldnt know and hence, that becomes his problem. but my dad said that i have the wrong mindset. He also said that people will associate me with being a sex worker or a frequent club goer if i wear those outfits and that people will talk bad things about me. But lets just be honest, the people that hes talking about are just his friends and my uncles and aunts.
Im starting to get annoyed because he keeps bringing “respecting my boyfriend” as the main reason why i should not wear the clothes that i wear, but i think its just the fact that he doesnt want to admit that hes worried that his friends think he didnt raise me well. im pretty sure, im already very tame compared to many of my friends. ive only stayed out past 12am once with my friends and boyfriend. and ive nvr been to a club, even though i want to go at least once in my life. ive only drank alcohol 5 times in my life, and never to the point whr im wasted.
To give context the dress that i was wearing was from The Editor’s Market called the Sarelia Linen Halter Neck dress (but i wore it as a tube top)
I also have The Editor’s Market Shalisa Cross-Back Dress
and The Editor’s Market Elvenia Mini Slip Dress.
Pls tell me if these are too revealing