Just something that I thought might help people who went through or who are going through something similar:
I am someone who went into a relationship rather quickly, I don’t consider much so long as he fit my criteria and the feeling is mutual.
Right now, I am in a healthy relationship myself and I would like to share with people that it’s easy to recognize a toxic relationship after you take a step back and see it from a third person POV.
I am pretty sure when people are in a bad relationship, they too know it as well, be it whether you have invested too much (like my case before), or you don’t love yourself well enough and hope that someone will save you (also my case). After ending a few relationship that’s bad for me, I realise what those have in common is each time a break up happens, I am the one who’s begging for them to return to me, which is very degrading for myself, I put them in pedestal and forgot that I am someone who’s deserving of love.
I wasn’t in a good place to receive and yet I kept giving till there was nothing good left.
Most of my friends can see that those relationships are slowly eating me away and yet I couldn’t see it myself, I invested way too much emotionally, and I got comfortable to a point that it wasn’t good anymore.
Cheating, emotionally abuse, especially the latter, isn’t something that I am familiar with until I read up myself, it got you to thinking that maybe, there’s something wrong in myself after all.
What I hope to put it across is, don’t be afraid to step out if you find yourself in a toxic relationship or you suspect that you are abuse emotionally. Walk out, and I can guarantee that it may not be on the actual day that you will feel it, but weeks or months later, you will feel that it’s easier to breathe, you will be smiling more.
I met my current boyfriend on dating app and he’s the best that can happen to me after I have cleared my head well and being in a emotionally well place to receive love and also, to give love. He’s everything that my ex isn’t, he calls when he says he will, he sends me home late at night even it means he has to cab home himself, he stills do those things that he did when he woos me, basically his actions speaks volume. He’s still the same as he is from the start till we are a year into the relationship now.
To everyone who’s suffering in their relationship, walk out now, and I hope that your next relationship will be the one that makes you smile more.