Should I stay or leave?
I started with this company at the beginning of the year, viewing it as a fresh beginning because of its unique teaching approach and values.
I genuinely appreciate the excellent work-life balance and the supportive nature of my big boss. Additionally, the location is convenient for my part-time studies.
However, there is a downside. I often feel like an outsider at work, with no close connections and very few people to talk to.
For some unknown reason, my colleagues frequently engage in gossip behind my back, even though I’m not aware of any wrongdoing on my part.
I’ve tried to be proactive, initiating conversations and activities, but they tend to dismiss my efforts, saying, ‘it’s okay, no need.’
I’m contemplating leaving because of my colleagues, but I’m also having second thoughts because I highly value the support I receive from my big boss.
Netizens’ comments
- I think you can find the friendship balance outside of work. Don’t give it up for gossiping colleagues because it sounds like you have a boss which you can look to as a mentor.
- Your colleagues are not your friends
- If you are new, gossipers will want to know which side you are on before they start to engage with you. As gossips fly as fast as backstabbing, they would want to know if they are safe. Be polite and professional. Dont mingle more than necessary. Once they are starved with information, they will have no choice but to indulge (especially if you did something that have the slightest potential of affecting their interests). So bottom-line is dont engage them – let them engage you.
Eventually you will meet some like minded ones. Maintain distance and observe. Trust what they do not what they say. Act with caution but with kindness. If they reciprocate, they are worthy of your time.
Most important person is your immediate superior, if possible stay and observe how he handles things. He is your inspiration or your inspiration to do better. Dont hope that you can get a better boss by hopping cos politics is everywhere. You have to sharpen your instincts to navigate them. - Why do you care about what your colleagues think of you ?
- Is this your first full time job? The reason is am asking is that close connection with colleagues can take years to form, especially in a company with mature workers. It is not uncomon for someone to work 5 to 10 years in a company and not make any real friends.
As for the gossip portion, my take is that human LOVES to gossip behind others back. This is our nature and everyone does it. Have you ever commented on an incident? on a person’s new hairstyle? Talked about something that happened without the person involved present? If you did, you are gossiping behind others back.
You are new to the company and your co-workers will naturally be interested in you.