Bro, I need to vent because what the absolute eff just happened to me tonight.
Met this girl on Tinder last week. Texting was quite smooth, profile looked normal, standard aesthetic café pics. We agreed to hit up a casual Japanese izakaya around Bugis for dinner on a Sunday night.
I reach the restaurant, find our table, and I see TWO women sitting there. The girl, and a middle-aged aunty looking at me with severe inspector general eyes. Before I can even sit down, the girl hits me with a nervous smile and goes, “Hi! Hope you don’t mind, my mummy came along just for safety! Singapore nowadays so dangerous, so she just wanna make sure you’re not a scammer.”
Bro. Safety? In Bugis Izakaya at 7 PM?
I was so stunned my brain jammed, so I just smiled like an idiot, sat down, and said okay no worries. Big mistake. HUGE mistake.
When the menu came, I thought okay lah, maybe aunty will just order one green tea and watch us like a hawk. NOPE. Aunty took the QR code menu like she was evaluating a commercial procurement tender.
Me and the girl ordered light—one ramen each and a green tea. Standard stuff.
Aunty? Aunty unlocked her final boss form:
- Premium Unagi Don
- Wagyu beef skewers (2 sets!)
- Sashimi platter (the big one)
- Tempura moriawase
- Hot sake (she say “cold weather need to warm up”, hallo aircon high only)
- Matcha ice cream with red bean for dessert
The table was so packed the waiter had to bring a side table. Me and her daughter were literally sharing a bowl of ramen in the corner while aunty was feasting like an Empress on high rotation. Whole night, she didn’t even ask me what I do for work or what my hobbies are. She was 100% focused on dissecting the wagyu.
When the bill came… total was $280+.
The girl looked at me, hit me with the “So how are we splitting?”
I looked at the receipt. Me + girl = $45. Aunty = $235.
I paid for my own ramen and tea ($22), transferred via PayNow on the spot, stood up, said “Thanks for the meal aunty, very good taste in wagyu,” and walked out.
Currently sitting at the Bus Stop waiting for 190 while the girl is blowing up my WhatsApp saying I’m ungentlemanly and not mature. Am I the A-hole here or did I just dodge a whole family unit scam?!