I (21) and my boyfriend (24) have been together almost a year and a half. Since we’ve been together he would often get hammered at a friends house every weekend and I would have to take care of him.
I had enough after he went to a local concert and got so drunk he peed himself twice. This was in April. After a long conversation he seemed to understand that it was time for him to grow up.
However, every time we went somewhere he got so drunk he peed himself or in the bed. I begged him to stop after each time fighting back tears and he always said it was the last time but it never was.
I reached my breaking point his birthday weekend. This was after 4 months of having the same conversation. He got hammered with his friends and they decided to go to the bar.
He had already peed his pants before he got there and had to borrow a friends pair so he didn’t realize he didn’t have his wallet with him until he got there and they wouldn’t let him in.
He showed up to my house at 2 am with no idea how he got there. He could barely walk and couldn’t form a complete sentence. I took him back to his apartment.
The next day I told him we need a break until he stops doing this. He keeps telling me that I’ve really scared him this time and he’s getting a handle on it.
I almost wanted to believe him until I ran into his best friend’s girlfriend at a bar and she told me that after I told him we needed a break they all went to her family’s lake house for Labor Day weekend and he got blackout and peed on their couch.
I care about him and we have talked about our future together a lot but I can’t keep putting up with this. I think we make a great couple and we’re happy together but this is tearing us apart.
Is there any hope that he will change? How can I get him to see he needs to stop?